Two Sides of Me
by Darkheart13666
Summary: Balthazar is back but the tables are turned when he is tortured by Gabriel and John is the only one who can save him. But will John help or only hurt the broken demon more and Balthazar has a secret that will leave them all whirling./Complete/ more in character one pending.
1. Chapter 1

Balthazar peeled himself from the gum littered, slimy, pavement. He still couldn't believe he was back after what happened. The sound of footsteps roused Balthazar out of his thoughts, and told him there were people just down the alley way. "Evening gents ….and lady what can I do for you?" Balthazar purred easily trying to stay civil, and not to panic with a fake smirk that drove many to want to pummel the half-breed including a certain exorcist. Everybody knew demons were spiteful and wrathful creatures, and will often look for low powered or rookie demons to beat on just for the hell of it that or newly re-born ones as well. "Balllthazzzar…. Youuuu look, weaaak" hissed the lead demon half-breed while the others snickered and hissed, like little school children who had found another weaker child to pick on. "Still strong enough to take you on" Balthazar snapped back quickly losing his patients, and watching the other half-breeds just in case they decided they didn't want to wait for the order to strike. "You can't take us all on you cocky bastard" sneered the only female who's hair was dyed bleach blond and looked vaguely familiar, she had moved forward but the leader hissed at her causing her to step back, but a infuriating smirk was still plastered to her face. "What the hell did I do to you poor bastards?" Balthazar laughed his fingers slowly morphing into claws just in case that set them off, and like hell it did. Demons are able to look into the minds of human finding the thing they fear most and then bring it to life, they can do it to other demons as well. Before Balthazar knew what happened he was pinned down by four of the five demons, the leader was behind him but not touching him just yet. Balthazar smelt the blood, flesh, and booze on their breath and he shivered knowing nothing good can come out of pissed off and drunken demons. "What did I do too you bastards?" Balthazar growled it slightly muffled by the wall he was shoved and held against. "You took advantage of my girlfriend and then just left her!" roared the leader making Balthazar flinch and the other half-breeds to snicker. Bal then remembered some stupid, heartbroken like some human teenage girl half-breed that was throwing herself at him that he decided to have a one night stand with. Always the crazy ones huh? "Oh please last time I knew she threw herself at me it's not my fault that you like the crazy ones and whores on top of it you bastard!" Balthazar yelled back fangs flashing in the weak light that was casted by a street lamp down the alley way. "Don't try to slither out of this one Balthazar it won't work….. see me and my boys have found the perfect punishment for you" the leader hissed in Balthazar's ear making him growl and then Bal froze when he heard the sound of a fly being unzipped. "You're going to be our little whore for the night"

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><p>John sighed running a pale, long fingered, hand through his black mop of hair. The mirror was the enemy now that and any other reflective surface, it showed the dark bags under his blood shot eyes, and his pale skin that reminded John of the skin on a corpse. Whisky was the new friend of Johns instead of cigarettes but that could damage the body pretty well too, but then having ill regular hours and insomnia wasn't helping either. Demon actually ran away from the exorcist out of fear of literary having the hell beat out of them. A sudden whoosh of air knocked John out of his thoughts, (and nearly out of his chair). He turned and saw Chas, and instantly wished to be anywhere else but here. "Hey boss need to talk" Chas told him looking no different then he did before death, chipper and up for anything John asked him to do, except the glint in his eyes that told of imaginable power, and knowledge. "Great another holy crusade that won't help with the going to hell thing" John grumbled going to pour himself some more whisky and think that maybe he just passed out and was dreaming right now. "Oh you're not dreaming you're not that lucky John" Chas smiled, happy to know what it was like to have the ability to look in other minds. "Stay the fuck out of my head kid and get to the point" John growled, not vary loudly, but with a force that is didn't need to be. Chas sighed but the smile stayed, "You need to forgive someone, it will be tuff because of your history but you must" Chas told him suddenly going serious. "So I must forgive thy enemy to make my way up?" John asked, only to turn and see Chas was gone. "Precisely" John spun to see Chas at the window, with the overly sunny smile once again plastered to his face. "Did you come just to tell me that, or is there something else?" John growled annoyed by the kid, like he was in life. "Nope" Chas chirped after seemingly thinking about it a while John saw his wings signaling that he was about to go and decided to do something that he didn't get to do before at the cemetery. "Hey kid" John mumbled surprised the kid heard him, showing it by turning to him "Good luck and don't let them give you shit about knowing me" that earned a smile and a chuckle from Chas. John turned away but Chas didn't leave "Hey … you didn't do me wrong no matter what it seemed like" and before John could say anything Chas was gone. John sighed and poured more whisky, the telephone rang but John let it be, seeing the caller I.D. "John I know your there please just pick up" Angela pleaded though the answering machine for the hundredth time. John wanted to pick up and tell her to stop caller him, but instead he let her beat herself up over it. He knew it wouldn't last, he knew that it would never work; because where he knew how to deal with it she hadn't a clue, and didn't even try to understand them. He didn't embrace his powers, oh hell no, but she started hyperventilating every time she saw a half-breed, and it was embarrassing and annoying. That what most of their fights were about, why she just didn't deal with her powers, and she would call him a hypocrite, he would just shake his head and she would leave with a bang, of the door being slammed. He remembered the fight that lead to the breakup, she wanted him checked by a doctor for his worsening insomnia, and he declined she snapped at him that being afraid of doctors was a irrelevant fear, but he finally blew up and told her of the torture he was succumbed too. What the doctors did, how they made him watch other children be tortured as well, while whispering what they were going to do to him at night. Of course she starts to ask about why he didn't say anything, why he didn't get help, his reply "They were supposed to be the help ". After that she left in a huff, tears streaming down her cheeks, she came back later and after a long drawn out silence that was awkward as hell he said "I guess you didn't know I was that damaged should have warned ya" at that she bolted, and he raced after her but too bad for him her partner Xavier was waiting, and punched him in the face, before he could tell him that he came to apologize, and see if she was okay. She yelled and screamed at Xavier too get off him, that she over reacted and that it wasn't his fault, but the only thing that got the other man off John was him punching Xavier hard in the jaw. A few guys held Xavier back while John peeled himself from the pavement with some help from two other guys. After thanking the two quietly he turned and slunk back to his apartment casting a look towards the door that once lead to Beeman's apartment and wishing that his friend was still alive to talk too.<p>

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><p>Authors note: Well I've found a few stories with these two and decided what the hell I'll give it a shot I actually found those ones more entertaining so sorry guys but trust me I'll make it believable. Also I only own the guys that attacked Bal the rest belong to DC.<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

She heard the cries and screams, the woman was drawn to them for she once protected the innocent, and was powerful enough to take on several demons at once, now she found herself fighting just to open a box of cereal. She watched them repeatedly rape, and beat the other demon that then was left alone when he did not cry out anymore, and that's when the women stepped forward. She knew him the beaten one, he was the reason she now had to live like the vary humans she once mocked, a plane then formed in her mind and she grabbed him, dressed his limp form into what was left of his shredded cloths, and began to drag him back to her apartment.

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><p>When Balthazar awoken everything hurt, but he was on something softer then concrete, and warmer then the chilled L.A. air that he was ready for, so maybe it wasn't too bad. That was until he felt the shackles on his wrists, then he knew he was in trouble. He sat up, and it must of told he captor that he was awake because he heard approaching footsteps. He quickly looked around, and was horror struck at the wards to keep demons in, and ones to keep inside sounds inside the apartment, so if he screamed no one would hear. Something whizzed by his ear, and crashed against the wall, he spun to see none other than Gabriel standing there like nothing happened, and her hand were behind her back, and a smile was on her face. "How was your nap Bally?" she crooned to him like one to a child, or animal stepping closer, Balthazar tried to brake the chains but he quickly found they drained him of energy, and fear rose up like in the ally but he quickly smashed it down. "What the hell you whore!" he growled annoyed when she said nothing, and the smile stayed she stepped closer, and Balthazar hissed he tried to bunch up his muscles to get ready to defend himself but it hurt to bad and everything blurred and tilted. "Oh poor Bally did the other kids hurt you, let me help" Gabriel purred stepping closer, and hands coming forward, Balthazar then saw the water bottle she held that a cross floated in, and he felt dread rise. For demon getting holy water poured in one's eyes is like acid for a human. The pain was beyond anything, and Balthazar screamed slashed and clawed trying to get away from the laughing Gabriel and, her bottle of holy water, it also fell on his skin making it burn and crack, he growled and hissed in retaliation. He felt her grab his collar, and he felt the chains work their magic making it easy for her to pull him closer to her. "Now now Bally let me help that's all I want to do" She sneered pouring down his throat till it felt like it was going to just kill him then and there, but he wasn't that lucky. While he puked up holy water trying to get back breath that he usually didn't need, he felt her lean over and heard her whisper "That's a good boy and then tonight you shall be punished for what you have done". As he fell back into a nightmare filled sleep, he wondered what Gabriel had in store for him.<p>

When Balthazar awoken he found that he could see but just barley, and he found it was once again night time. 'I should be able to see, my healing should've fixed my eyes!' he thought but before he could think any longer he heard Gabriel's footsteps, and he was disgusted with himself when he actually felt fear rise. He tensed waiting for anything, but it strained his already abused muscles, and he groaned in pain. He then felt the burst of pain over his cheek, caused by Gabriel punching him. It soon became a grueling and constant routine. The holy water in his eyes and throat were a constant, and so were floggings for no reasons but what was worst was the sexual and other tortures she came up with. Sometimes it was staying in freezing cold water in the tub, others were him having to please her with his hands or he would be viscously beat, or wouldn't be given food something that the chains apparently did. This cut off from hell also cut him off of others demon, that would help him, this left him susceptible to things like hunger fatigue and feelings. He knew he was going mad whether it was the constant whispering of what he did from Gabriel or the way that when Gabriel left all he could think about was John, Angela, Beeman, Hennessy, and Chas and how he destroyed their lives.

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><p>Balthazar whimpered as he felt the vibratos push farther into him, and tried to stay awake but sleeping sounded so good, and he debated to himself weather it was worth the ach from collapsing in the chains that held his arms above his head. Everything ached, and for once Balthazar begged and prayed for Gabriel to return from his job, but it seemed the time he once cherished and yet hated, would be spent still tortured at the hands of Gabriel. He suddenly saw the blurry spirits …. or were they hallucinations, of Beeman and Hennessy standing before him just watching him, he pleaded throe the unneeded gag Gabriel had provided he begged and wept, the pleasure the toy provided slowly morphing to pain, and his pleas became screams of anger, pain, and sorrow.<p>

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><p>Authors note: : yup Gabriel back and as mean as she can get as a human but she has some tricks up her sleeves...and if your confused yes John and other kids were raped in the hospital but it will go in more detail about that later.


	3. Chapter 3

John stared at the fog of pollution that clung to the tops of the building's, like a sheet that had been draped over them all. Another job another night of nothing but him, a bottle of Jack, and the nicotine urges, that were sure to kill him faster than the alcohol that took the place for food in his diet. He didn't turn around at the sound of wings, lately his home became a landing pad for his friends turned angels, and even Isabel, decided to join the scare the hell out of John club. He wasn't always frightened by the sudden appearance of his dead friends, but he still hated finding himself jumping at something while in the safety of his own apartment, when he was supposed to feel safe there. "What is it this time another 'pull yourself together John' speech, or are you going to tell me some more cryptic bullshit about forgiving somebody, that you won't tell me who a chance, or that not is all what it seems?" John sneered at whoever it was, thinking to himself that this whole thing was tiring, and old and that a warm bath may help his aching muscles more, than just the pounding of water he would get if he took a shower. "I more came to tell you that your keeping your slate pretty clean, and too keep it up, but I can talk about the other ones if you want me too" snipped back a British accented voice that could only belong to Beeman, one of his only friends that weren't perturbed by his sarcasm, like Hennessy, Chaz, and Angela were. There were no outside signs but they often shot looks at him when he said something sarcastic, were Isabel it often just went over her head, her personality a little too cheerful for his liking but it amused him. He smirked at his old friend from over his shoulder, and won a smile back and closed the window, trying to not think about the last time he went out there, it was to watch them pull Beeman's body out of his apartment behind the bowling alley. "Sorry but it actually nice up there, and we hope you can cause a little chaos when you get up there, because were bored mate" Beeman joked grinning, showing John his crooked yellow teeth, and John smirked. "No dental help up there, or are you refusing it?" and Beeman chuckled and shook his head, his once jumpy and bug like movements less but not completely gone, and John was glad to see that his friend hadn't changed that much, since death and heaven. "I don't know who your referring too when you tell me to forgive them, and I'm not about to beg" John sighed and Beeman flinched at the detached note to his friends voice, knowing that he was going through a rough time. Not only with them popping out of nowhere, but also because jobs were harder to find, as though the entire world knew that the exorcist was none too pleased with the world, and didn't want to do something to gain his wrath. "I wish I could mate but they don't want us too" Beeman told John and motioning to the heavens showing he was quite helpless in the whole ideal and John sighed in defeat knowing full well it was probably true. "A year and a half Beeman and nothing is going on either something big is going to happen soon or maybe I need to redo my resume" what John didn't know was currently a demon on the other side of L.A. found that because of malnutrition he could escape his shackles and was planning on escaping the Hell that took the form of a quaint apartment owned by a man who used to be above it all.

Two figures watched as Bal was beat ruthlessly, and tortured maliciously by the once strong minded Gabriel, who seemed to suddenly know more about torture then most of the agents that the man in the white pristine suit, had under his command. His companion stood still and quiet, not a single emotion shown as he watched the beatings, and torments watching the demon slowly lose his mind, and his vision. "It's about time for him to be released from what I hear John too is becoming restless." And the man in the white suit nodded, looking over at his grey suited companion, and knowing that it would be good for both the demon and the man to be together, the suited men looking beings, knowing that they were more alike than even they know.

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><p>Authors Note: ... Review please... dont own the characters.<p> 


	4. Chapter 4

John sighed in frustration wishing for a cigarette, and hoping that Midnight wasn't losing his touch in finding those in trouble. He stared at the completely normal and boring apartment building, there were few dealers milling about, and most of them looked like they weren't the type to stab you just for looking at them funny. Once inside he found graffiti free walls, and a desk clerk that looked younger then Chas, who was rocking the fuck out. John was sure that music wasn't supposed to be that loud unless he wanted to blow out his eardrums, and John was sure if he kept banging his head like that his brain would fall out. Yup Midnight had lost his touch, and that meant a long day for him. What he didn't know was that Bal using his saliva and blood as lubricant, and had slipped his cuffs, and crawled his way to the bathroom, his hands acting as eyes since had lost the use for his own. The demon sobbed when he didn't first feel the cool blades under his finger tips, but sighed and praised, whoever was currently watching over him when he felt the blade cut into his questing finger tips slightly. He found, and after much fumbling, and experimenting turned the water on hot, falling in he sighed at the heat since the apartment felt like it was the ice age again, much too cold for a sick and hurt demon like Balthazar. He took a deep faltering breath feeling the cool, and suddenly heavy blade that was held by his bleeding and slippery fingers, he then put it to his wrist and prayed that it would happen quickly. If his blood wasn't pounding in his ears he may of heard the knocking that quickly turned angry, and the warning of a gun from a familiar voice, he may of stopped but he didn't, and traded wrists and rejoiced when a warm blackness unlike the one that now cursed him began to take over.

John sighed in frustration, and after quickly looking around broke down the door only to find an empty, and at first look, a normal apartment. John then noticed the beaten lumpy mattress that sat in the corner, and the chains that adorned the wall, blood and puke telling him it was more than just some stupid kink the owners had. He also took notice, and broke down the wards just in case the demon was out of whoever was possessed, but wouldn't leave the apartment because it was trapped. The exorcist had that happen before, and was nearly possessed because of it, he didn't feel like dealing with being possessed today. He heard the sound of water sloshing, and instantly went on edge, hoping that he wouldn't walking into some kind of drowning, ignoring the flash backs of Angela and older jobs, he could still hear the mother humming twinkle twinkle little star, and the cries of the child. They had told him he was a hero that day, but all he heard was the women humming, as thou trying to sooth the child she had tried to drown it left him with nightmares that never seem to end. The sight he was met with would give anybody nightmares, and John felt bile burn in his throat the small amount of food now cursing his stomach begin to come up, he hadn't known how bad his own attempt looked but he's was sure that it wasn't close to the mess this guy was. His cloths were in shreds, and body covered in scars, lacerations, and bruises that's shades amazed the exorcist, everything from greenish yellow too dark purple. Blood and clumps of who knows what stuck in his hair, and his breathing was sporadic, weather from the bruises or internal bleeding he didn't know. When John got close he finally saw the man clearly, and felt his aura finding that he was actually a half-breed demon, and one John had believed dead his death a product of John's doings. "Balthazar ….." John asked weakly unable to believe this had once been the untouchable, and infuriating demon that was sure to always come back without a scratch, and torment him endlessly with that damn pet name. He felt the last few months of self educed torture suddenly catch up to him, and he currently had no whisky on him to quell the feeling that he had been running from more desperately, knowing he had only so much time before his body gave out on him dragged the soaked demon out of the tub, and checked his breathing happy to feel the faint heart beat, and shallow breathing, but knowing he had only so much time to get help. He dragged the demon out into the hallway, and made their way to the thankfully working elevator, putting the demon down carefully before falling onto the elevator floor with a thud. John prayed to anyone to help him to get Balthazar to a hospital in time, not really understanding why he suddenly felt responsible for the demon, but decided to dwell on it later, and focus on getting the desk clerks attention. Lucky for him and Balthazar, the clerk's friend had come over and the two were talking about who knows what, but that meant he could hear more than the music that once played in his ears. "Help me!" John yelled, and sighed when he saw that the clerk was coming while his friend was calling an ambulance, and telling the needed info surprisingly calm and maturely, while the other kid was helping them out of the elevator, cautious of their injuries. "What happened man?" the kid asked brown eyes filled with worry, and John shook his head not quite sure what to say 'Oh I'm an exorcist that came here expecting a possessed man not a half-breed that a year and a half ago who helped the son of Satan nearly rise and create hell on earth', that's one way to end up back in Ravenscar. Everything begun to blend together, and he felt the world tilt he took one last look at Balthazar, and he swore that instead of seeing a demon, he saw that Balthazar was an angel.

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><p>Authors Note: Two in one night :D Review please still not my characters. Theirs also a movie reference in this one it was one of Keanu Reeves earlier and less serious roles :)<p> 


	5. Chapter 5

When John woke back up he was in the most dreaded of places, Ravenscar hospital he growled when he noticed all the machines connected to him, but was happy he wasn't in one of those paper gowns they seemed to have you bent on wearing. "Good your awake" a voice growled, and he looked over to see none other than Midnight glowering at him like he had just done yet another stupid stunt, after re thinking it over he found that it was a stupid stunt, one that for once had not been on purpose. He was about to open his mouth to explain but Midnight just held up his hand, telling John that he already knew what the smart ass was going to say, and didn't want to hear it. "I have to get back to my club, so play nice, and don't cause the nurses too much trouble John, their doctor is an old friend of mine" then before John could do so much as blink, Midnight was gone, the faint wine, incense, and blood smell (the same as his club) was the only thing that told John he had been there in the first place. He then remembered why he was there in the first place, and called for a nurse who told him he should get some more rest, but one look from the exorcist had her shutting up, and letting him go see Balthazar telling him where to go, and that the two of them will be let go tomorrow. John was happy to relies that tomorrow wasn't too far away, and decided to look at Balthazar one last time just too be sure that it wasn't a insomnia fueled hallucination, and really him. Sure enough it was the demon, beaten, bloody but still the demon, before John could truly wrap his head around it they began get the demon ready for moving home, and of course they meant his home since Midnight had told them the two of them lived together, and John sighed in annoyance when he saw a group of nurses shoot him pitiful, and sorrowful eyes. John was surprised when the nurses left the two of them alone in his apartment, but he wasn't about to question or give any indication that he couldn't take care of himself, and the demon. His mind still whirled with the information they had gave him, and told him how bad the damage was, telling him how to take care of the wounds, giving him pain killers, and creams for Balthazar burns and bruises. John also remembered when they told him the demon was blind, the world tilted again "He's blind" he murmured to himself, his mind reeling with the idea. Demon's weren't vary friendly creatures, and that also applied to their on how they act to their own kind, John had heard about demon acting like humans, killing each other over little things like words or actions, but it was rare, and often they would just beat the hell out of each other. John had also never heard of disabled demons, but he was sure it was because they were supposed to be able to fix any problem easily, that gave John hope that Balthazar will quickly heal, and be out of his house soon. After three days of having the _**unconscious**_ demon in his apartment told him that somehow whoever trapped him, drained him of his powers as well, thus Balthazar had the same healing abilities of a human. He also on the first day found that his mouth was slightly burnt, and feared that the demon might not be able to eat, and drink and was happy when he became conscious enough to drink, and eat the oatmeal, and small bits of food John gave him. The fourth day the demon actually really woke up, a thump from his bed room stirred him from where he now slept on the couch, and he flinched at the sight of the demon all curled in on himself, and whimpering like an animal. John begun to step forward, and felt a flash of sympathy when the demon began to sob, and choke out that he was sorry, and that he would never try it again, he started forwards again when the demon began to say it over and over again like a broken record. John crouched in front of the demon, and felt his heart ache when he actually saw the demon face, some bruising on it, and tears streak down his cheeks, without much thought he reached out and brushed them away aware of the bruises, with such gentleness he surprised himself. He began to speak, not quite sure what to say, but tried his best to sooth the demon …no man before him "Balthazar it's me John … your safe … I'm not going to let whoever did this hurt you … okay your fine" he said this while wiping away the tears, and shushing him like a father would a scared child. John for last few days have been trying to sort his feelings out for the demon, but had little to no luck in getting any closer to the answer, and he quickly gave up finding it only pissed him off, and made his headaches worse. He kept murmuring that he was safe, and okay while slowly trying to get the demon to uncurl himself, who was in the fetal position still trying to sooth, he was suddenly afraid that the demon was also deaf, but then the demon murmured his name sightless eyes lighting up, he sighed in relief. "Yes Bal it's me….ah!" that was John suddenly being latched onto by Balthazar, who sobbed that he was sorry for killing him and that it wasn't meant to happen like that. This just confused John more, but he decided not to dwell on it, instead he focused on getting Balthazar into the bathroom to give him a bath, since the last time it happened was at the hospital before, and after they bandaged him up. He flushed red at the idea of bathing the demon like some child, but he knew it was necessary, since he didn't want the demon complaining about pain if anything got infected, but from the way he was acting he was just happy to be out of the apartment, and that John found him. He stopped Balthazar, who had been mumbling sorry, and seemed to be trying to process that he wasn't in whoever's grip right now, John then got enough courage to ask the question had been causing him the most headaches lately, who had done this to the demon. "Balthazar can you tell me who did this to you … I need to know." John asked, and nearly fell on his ass when Balthazar suddenly became dead weight, falling to his knees, and begged John not to beat him anymore that he learned his lesson to tell Gabriel …wait Gabriel? "Gabriel is the one that tortured you?" John asked, and it was confirmed, when Balthazar whimpered at his ex-captors name. "What else then beat, and burn you did she do Balthazar?' John asked, and felt his stomach drop when the demon shivered, and whimpered some more. It was also confirmed when John began to take off Balthazar's cloths, and Balthazar began to shout, and beg. John quickly hushed him, touching him softly knowing anger, and harshness would do nothing but start more trouble, then the already emotionally drain exorcist could handle, and he wished he could get some help from Angela, who was better with emotionally hurt people then he was. John held back a gasp when he saw the bruising on Balthazar's thighs, and ass telling him of the rough treatment Gabriel gave the demon, John tried to tell himself that on some level Balthazar deserved it because of what he did, but then his friends words came back to him, about forgiving, and even those that killed sometimes deserved it, and he knew his fiends didn't mind him helping the demon, but once again John wondered why?

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><p>Authors note: ... damn it Johns really out of character now -_- whatever ...review and their not mine.<p> 


	6. Chapter 6

John chuckled as he unraveled the demon from his bandages, since he looked like a kid that dressed as a mummy, and helped the demon into the tub, that had been fixed by an alchemist who owed John. He filled it with hot water, and then grumbled under his breath when the phone rang, and told the demon to relax, giving up when he didn't move a muscle, as thou paralyzed. "Constantine" John growled watching the demon from where he stood, "John it's me Angela please don't hang up I need your help" she begged quickly, and John rolled his eyes "I can't really help I have my own hands full, but I can pull some strings, and get an exorcist out their if that's what you need" John told her, still watching the demon wearily. "What did you do now John?" Angela sighed wearily, and he pictured her glaring at the phone, and he smirked. "It's nothing I can't handle …for once" John smirked when he heard her grumble under her breath. Yet another reason they had broke up, Angela acted more like a mother then an girlfriend at times, and he didn't need that when he got home late, or when he came home, and woke her up because he was bandaging himself up. "Like I said this I can handle, and I will send a exorcist over to help with whatever" after all that was done he checked in on Balthazar, who had washed and rinsed himself, after John asked him too. John watched the demon try to clean his back, which was marred from what looked like being whipped with a belt, and stepped forward to help, happy when the demon didn't whimper or flinch, but asked a question that made Balthazar flinch anyway "How did you escape the shackles?" John was now rinsing his back, and began to wash his hair, he was afraid that Balthazar wasn't going to answer, and flinched when he told him that he escaped because his wrist were smaller thou malnutrition, and that he used blood, and saliva as lubricant. '"Your safe now, once your healed you can decide were you want to go, maybe get some help from Midnight…" John trailed away and began to rinse Balthazar's hair, Balthazar then spoke voice weak and shaking "Or I can make it easier, and just kill myself I can do it by myself John, just put a knife in my hand you can tell them you didn't know, that you-" John cut him off with a growl of hell no. "I'm not gonna let that happen Balthazar, you have as much right to live as I do, so shut up about killing yourself because as long as you're under my roof, it's not gonna happen." John growled firmly as sudden protectiveness taking over, to keep the demon safe from others, evens himself. He then emptied the tub, and wrapped the demon in a warm towel, and suddenly felt something wrap around his wrist, and looked down to see it was the demons tail, the long, black, scaly appendage ended with an arrow head tip. "Thank you" Balthazar murmured, and his tail slowly unraveled from John's wrist, John muttered back that is wasn't a problem, since it really wasn't, sure the exorcist trade wasn't going to well, but he had some money saved up from doing rather difficult jobs, and from selling Midnight various things. He then dragged the demon in to his bedroom, and found him some cloths telling the demon that this was the smallest cloths he had, and once again John had to stop himself from laughing at the demons look. Baggy jeans, and an old t-shirt with him all bandaged up like he was, it was sad but funny at the same time. "Is it really that bad?" Balthazar asked with a weak smile, that didn't really do much but remind him that the demon was hurt "No it's just …I'm not used to seeing you out of those suits." John told him eyes' flitting over the demons prone form, unable to believe this was really Balthazar, and smiling sadly. They were snapped out of inspecting each other by the phone, John using his eyes, Balthazar his ears, and the few demonic powers he had left to read the magician's aura, and mood Balthazar flinched at the flash of annoyance from John's aura, and felt soothed when it calmed at the outward sign of fear from the demon. "Constantine" he snapped at the person who turned out to be a nurse from the hospital, who gave him info about a local store for the blind, but he wasn't really paying any mind to the nurse, only writing down the essentials, and watching Balthazar who was slowly making his way around the apartment, trying not to bump into anything and failing. "Thank you" John told her curtly hanging up, and purposely tapped his foot to tell Bal where he was, and watched in slight amazement as Balthazar followed the sound rather efficiently. "You hungry I can make something?" John asked, and wasn't surprised when Balthazar nodded, and John began to make tomato soup with grilled cheese, turning on the radio, and enjoying the peacefulness. The next morning John woke up to the demon making breakfast, and was surprised that the demon became more independent, thou he still bumped into things often cursing colorfully to himself, and John couldn't help but laugh when he did. The same day they had supper together, and John found that the strangest things set the demon into a begging mess. He had dropped a plate, a sudden thump caused him to look over were Balthazar had been putting dishes away at, and saw the demon curled in the fetal position, pushed up against the wall shaking horribly eyes tearing up. He then cursed when the demon began to pick the pieces of broken glass up, with his bare hands franticly, and he pushed the demon back slowly taking the glass shards out of his hands, and picked up the rest of the pieces up then threw them away, turning back to the demon. "The hell was that about Bal?" John asked finding that he talked in a whisper, trying to look at the demon hands, and giving up because he held them tight to himself, he was also rocking and whispering to himself as thou he couldn't hear John. It took him two hours just to get the demon calm enough to look at his hands, and get him to speak "I-I … Gabriel one time threw a plate at me, a-and I just wanted t-to be left alone s-s-so I did as he asked." Balthazar licked his lips eyes overflowing with tears, and he kept shivering and gasping as thou he couldn't get a breath of air. "I h-held out my hands filled with the b-b-roken glass, then he made my hands crush the glass be-tween t-them" Balthazar finished biting his bottom lip eyes closed tightly, and gasped when John reached out, and ran a hand thru Balthazar's hair slicking it back, because it was still wet from his bath. "Let's forget about it and go watch T.V." John murmured, helping the demon up, and over to the couch, sitting down finding some alien movie too watch, when the demon piped up "Uh …John I can't really …watch T.V." Balthazar murmured bushing slightly, and John thanked god that Balthazar couldn't because he was sure he would ask why he was blushing. "Sorry Bal …I didn't …I'm used to "John stuttered out, and gave up when Balthazar smiled shyly and he blushed even more when Bal touched his knee. "It's fine let's just watch the movie ...well you know what I mean." Balthazar amended with a light chuckle eyes looking in the same direction as the T.V. was and John murmured yeah and went back to watching the movie. They fell asleep a little later Bal's hand still on Johns knee.

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><p>Author Note: ...no comment I guess<p> 


	7. Chapter 7

Balthazar woke up on Johns chest, ear pressed against it, and for awhile just listen to the magician's breath, and to the thumping heartbeat. Balthazar then began to think of the past days he had been under John's roof, finding that for some reason he wasn't hit for talking, or beat for crying. He was a demon, he deserved it because he had done bad things, because he needed to pay for what he had done, or at least that's what Gabriel always told him, and near the end of being their he believed it too. He was knocked out of his musings when John suddenly took a deep breath, and stretched the best he could with the demon on his chest. That word demon also for some reason felt wrong, he was no angel, their was a voice that seemed muffled, but he knew what it was trying to say, but the word never came, because John began to pet him gently, and it felt so good. John smiled slightly when he woke to the feel of the demon on his chest, and it grew a little when the demon began to purr from the attention he gave him, breathing in Bal's scent, and relaxing completely thinking to himself on how nice this was, and how right it felt. "Don't get too used to him Johnny-boy, once healed he'll leave, and you'll be alone like before" a voice warned him in his head, but ignored it because right then everything was perfect, and warm. Bal stretched a little, and then breathed in Johns scent, enjoying the smell of cheap whiskey, coffee, and musk that was Johns own scent, and thought that maybe he was in heaven but shook it out the idea, reminding himself that he was a demon, and never deserved heaven, he also briefly wondered why heaven would be with John, and not his friends Jim and Anthony. They had been the closest thing to family he ever got, and they all knew each other for as long as he could remember, he then wondered why they hadn't found him, not John, and he felt anger, and grief rise up raising tears to his eyes. John suddenly felt Balthazar began to shake, and looked down to see him crying again John was instantly confused, unsure if he, or something else set the demon off, and quickly asked him what was wrong "My friends just …they didn't come looking for me" Balthazar murmured trying to get up, but John held him their John then realized what Balthazar meant, and spoke. "Bal I even couldn't feel you, until I was in the apartment the wards Gabriel set up blocked you from being felt by anybody, or anything" John told him trying to sooth him, and keeping a hold on him, watching the demon's sightless eyes brighten at that. "So …they "Balthazar began, and was cut off by John "They were looking for you, just couldn't find you because your aura was cut off" And John smiled when Bal relaxed, and set his head on John's chest, they sate like that for some time Bal purring, and John petting him. "You know we could check out that store today, I don't have anything going on..." John trailed away, and Balthazar nodded, and suddenly sate up, ran his hands over Johns face, whether he was trying to read it or what John didn't know but he got caught in looking into Balthazar's hazel eyes, and felt a slight blush creep up his neck. 'What the hell is my problem, when did I ever blush this much, when the hell did I ever began to care for anybody other then myself?' John thought to himself. He decided around when he took Chas as an apprentice, of course it started as a selfish idea, and then suddenly he found him attached to the kid. Angela was the same way, do what she wanted him to do, and get money out of her, but once again he found that he became more attached to her then he should've, and before he knew it they had a real relationship. "Your frustrated" Bal murmured snapping John out of his thoughts, and he sighed "Yeah just trying to figure something out ... let's get ready to go out" John murmured pushing the demon off his lap. The sounds, and smells of the morning made the apartment felt lived in, and John couldn't believe that this was his home the same two years ago was silent and haunting, Chas one time joked that he had seen friendlier haunted houses. John began making food, while Balthazar took a shower all was fine until a thump and cursing joined the sounds of the apartment, John went to check on Balthazar only to find of him on the bottom on the tub, looking irate the look caused John to burst out laughing. Before he knew it he found himself in the tub, on all fours, on top of Balthazar, who looked smug that now the exorcist was quickly drenched, and speechless. "What were you laughing about John?" Balthazar asked smugly, eyes bright with mischief, and John couldn't help but smile happy seeing the demon this relaxed "Brat" John snapped back, but his aura gave away the fact he wasn't the least angry, but happy even, and it seemed contagious. When Gabriel took his powers, he also took away the barriers all angels, and demons had from being effected by others auras, so when Gabriel was often tormenting Bal, it wasn't only physically, mentally, but emotionally as well. Feeling all the anger directed at him, made him weary, and convinced him that he deserved the punishment that he received, surly someone can't be that angry with him, without doing something unspeakable to him. "Well I know your getting your strength back" John joked, and Bal smiled "Sometimes the strangest of people can help" Balthazar murmured, and John silently agreed with him finding that his mood had greatly improved since the demon had arrived. "Glad I'm helping someone" John murmured flushing red when he realized that Balthazar was naked, and felt a flash of lust he then tried to get up only to feel Balthazar's lips on his own. John's resistance fell, and kissed him back, loving how soft Balthazar's lips were, and licked his bottom lip asking Bal for entrance, that was gave slowly but surely, and John began to lap at his mouth, instead of just shoving his tongue down Balthazar's throat . He soon teased Balthazar's tongue to tangle with his, enjoying the kiss even thou it was slow, and savored the taste of Balthazar's mouth, and from the way Bal groaned, and moaned quietly he too was enjoying it. John pulled back, and smiled at the sound of protest that came from the demon, he turned the water off that had been turning cold, and then pressed his lips to Bal's again, who quickly opened his mouth and moaned when Johns tongue snuck in. John pulled back, breathing erratic, and head in a whirl, Bal was the same way, blind eyes glazed, and was biting his bottom lip "We will never get anything done if we start this Bal" John gasped, and Bal smirked "You didn't seem to mind, or was it my imagination when your tongue touched mine that you moaned" he teased lightly getting up, and grabbing the towel he set out for himself after some rummaging, and toe hitting. John smiled eyes moving over Bal's form, and tight ass Bal then spoke, smiling wickedly "You might want to take a shower John" He said this while his tail turned on the cold water, and he closed the curtain shut. John gasped at the cold water, and then began to shout profanities that would make a sailor blush, but Bal was too busy laughing, and getting changed into some of the cloths John had set to the side for him.

"Pure fucken evil Bal" John growled, causing the demon to snicker again they were walking throe the park that was across the road from Johns apartment. The weather was warm and dry, prompting John to roll his sleeves up, tie loose, and jacket was left at home. Balthazar was in a pair of John's jeans, and old Pink Floyd t-shirt, and old black scuffed boots, that were anything but quite. John ignored the stares tossed his way, but Bal was having a tuff trying to get used to them, a part of being a demon was blending in, and not drawing attention to one's self but being blind and having John hold on to his elbow, and guiding him around things, and people was drawing a lot of attention to them. John noticed how Bal began to slowly tense up, and spoke "Ignore them Bal, their just not used to seeing someone helping another human being" John sneered, and Bal nodded knowing how humans were indifferent to one another, more so in a big city like L.A. Bal then spoke, unsure if it was nervousness, or real interest that made him ask John something "Have you always lived in the city?" John looked over at Bal, and decided it wouldn't hurt to answer the question. "No I used to live in a suburb just outside the city, if I wanted to I could take my bike into the city." John told him steering Balthazar around two mothers talking in the middle of the path. "Oh …you like hanging around the city or…" Bal asked hoping he wasn't crossing a line, and John shook his head, then realized how useless the motion was and stopped, speaking instead "Not really, there weren't any half-breeds in the suburb I lived in, and I felt safe there, but I went to a school in the city so unless I was out of school for the day, or it was summer I was stuck going their everyday" John explained, remembering the countdown for summer, being ten times happier than any of his friends had been. "Oh sorry" Bal murmured, yelping when a bunch of pigeons took flight to get away from the demon, and exorcist. John apologized to him, and then remembered what he said "Well it's not your fault, it's really nobody's fault it's the way things are" John told him making sure to be careful not to have Bal run into anything again. "What about you?" John asked, seeing that in was only fair that if Bal asked questions, that he could ask some. "I have always lived in big cities, if you think about it every city could be called sin city" Balthazar told him, and John chuckled knowing the truth to that, and Bal relaxed happy he didn't piss the exorcist off with the comment. "You do anything like sports or band while in school?" Bal asked, and John told him how he played street hockey, and football "It was the only reason why I had friends, and wasn't constantly pummeled in school I was picked on, but not enough to really be bothered" he explained, and then told him about he was also in a band for a little bit, learning how to play the guitar by himself. "You play anything" John asked, mostly out of curiosity, and wanting to keep the demons mind off of the stares "Guitar and piano" Bal told him. They were soon at the shop, and John let Bal go to wander on his own, and he went to the front desk to talk to the lady who smiled at them kindly, and John began to talk to her about having Bal learn Braille. Bal let his hand trail along the spines of books, most of which were in Braille, and he wished that he knew how to read it, he then looked up when he heard the sound of John walking towards him, and he smiled at the exorcist who even thou Bal couldn't see smiled back. "Come on I got some books that will help you learn Braille" John told him, and the two left the store Bal thanking the lady who told them to have a good day, they then headed to a diner, and they talked some more. "After that I'm never going to Louisiana" John concluded, and Balthazar chuckled his eyes cast down as thou he didn't want to meet Johns eyes, but in reality just didn't want to have his eyes wandering over the exorcist, and creeping him out. John chuckled as he watched the demon struggle to find the last bits of food on his plate, and Bal shot him a playful glare at the man, which only caused make John laugh more. John then reached over, and grabbed his hand helping Balthazar spear the last bits of food on his plate, and chuckled when Bal stuck his tongue out at him like a child. "Really that's how mature you are" John teased, and Bal smirked "Oh no I could be much worse" he joked, and John shot him a dirty look "You wouldn't dare" he growled, and Bal laughed. "No I wouldn't because it's probably embarrassing enough to be helping a grown man find food right in front of him." Bal told him grinning mirthfully, but with no real bite like it used to hold in their older meetings. John rolled his eyes, "Please I've done worse I've hold grown man's head while they puked" John told him, and Balthazar pulled a face making John smirk. "I'm happy I'm done eating" Bal joked leaning back sighing contently, and John watched him, eyes tracing every line of Bal's body as thou he was trying to trace it into his mind. He thought of this morning, the shower, and kiss, touching Bal the whole time over to the store and to the diner, how they talked about simple meaningless things like music, cars, and politics over lunch. He also thought about how Bal wasn't as jumpy as before, and how he had calmed more as the day went on, and he wondered briefly if he had anything to do with it. "Bal are your walls up?" John asked, and Balthazar flinched, and shook his head "I can't fix them I've been trying all morning but as soon as I fix them, their tore down by people on the streets" he muttered hating on how bare he was feeling, and having to be sure to act on his, not some passing strangers feelings. John remembered the kiss in the shower, the sight and feel of Bal's underneath him stirring him even now, and watched a blush cross Balthazar's face showing that sure enough he couldn't sort his emotions, and Johns from one another. "Uh John t-that's not f-funny" he mumbled, and John backed off not wanting to become too aroused, and hoped Bal wouldn't, and muttered an apology looking away from the demon. "I'll help you fix them, I know what it's like having to constantly watch what you're doing, it's like having really bad ADD" John joked, and Bal smiled happy that the exorcist would help him instead of using it for his advantage. Bal shook off the last bit of Johns lust from himself, even thou he was fascinated by the feeling, because demons never really had any, and never enjoyed, or was cursed with them, like humans were. They then began talking of exorcisms, John explaining certain parts, and Bal explained others, the two of them thinking of other ways, and talking of how it had changed over the years. They soon hit the streets again, walking thru the park, but this time going by a duck pond and hung back, watching a man in tartan feeding them, once in a while having to push his glasses up, oblivious to the pair standing by the tree watching him. "So you can still feel auras?" John asked, and Bal nodded sitting down on the grass, and breathing in the smells of the city park, and listening to the gentle quaking of the ducks. If Bal concentrated he could hear the sounds of the city that surrounded them, above the laughing children, and the rustling leaves, the blaring horns and angry yelling people just slightly muted. For a second he was lost in the sound, as thou everything else disappeared, but then John broke the spell, much to Bal's relief "You alright your eyes are all glazed over" John asked, and he nodded taking deep shuddering breaths. "Just got lost in the sounds John, I'll be fine" Bal told him smiling in Johns direction, who chuckled knowing full well what that was like. Letting one sense take over was a good way to get a headache, and John had more than once let hearing, feeling, or smelling be his one sense, and it left him dizzy, confused, and swearing he won't do it again. The two soon were heading back to the apartment, in comfortable silence except a few comments from John, that had Bal laughing, or punching him, or sometimes both. John let Bal go when they got in his apartment, not fearing of the demon hurting himself on any of his equipment, having actually put it away, the same thing had been done with the knifes, just in case he suddenly had another memory lapse. "Mind if I turn on the radio?" Balthazar asked, and John told him that it was fine with him, soon they were listening to the radio John watching Balthazar running his hands over the books that they got, trying to figure out which one to start with. John after watching Bal struggle, went over to help him, and then when he found the one that taught Braille, he grabbed Balthazar hand, and put it their. "Thanks John" Bal murmured with a smile, and began to study the book with his fingers, "No problem Bal" John told him, and then began to look thru the cupboards to find something to cook for supper. A knock on his door caused Bal look up, and John went to answer it staring at the two characters standing there in the hallway. Both men had brown nearly black hair, and pale skin, and were both in suits, the younger one wore sunglasses, the older man eyes were brown nearly black like his hair. The older one was shorter than the young one, and had facial hair and had broad shoulders, and hair was thinning. "Hello my name is Jim, and this is my brother Anthony we were wondering if you-"John rolled his eyes, and closed the door unlocking it, and then reopened it, and smirked at the two confused demons in front of him. John have heard of the Crowley brother's, and seen them, but never actually meet the two of them, he knew one was the King of the crossroads but hell he went against Lucifer himself, these guys didn't scare him. Anthony then saw Bal who still sate at the counter, but was listening to the one sided conversation that abruptly stopped. "Bal I think these guys are your friends" John told him looking at them with disinterest, and earned narrow eyes from 'Jim', but Bal came forward slowly as thou he was afraid that it was imposters, but when he got close enough, and felt the demons auras he relaxed, and smiled at them relived to have his friends nearby. "Hey guys" Bal murmured stepping out of the magicians apartment, and into the hallway the brothers instantly embraced him the way they often didn't do in public, and Bal instantly knew they did miss him. "We've been looking for you Bal, were in the name of hell were you?" Jim asked hand still on Bal's shoulder, and that's when he saw he friends sightless eyes, and gulped. "Long story short, a real pain of the ass's apartment" Bal told them smiling weakly, and he heard Jim spin on his heel, and felt his aura suddenly alight with anger. "No he didn't do this to me, he saved me" Bal quickly explained grabbing Jims arm, and feeling him relax but not completely, and he knew Jim, and Anthony wanted an explanation. John let them into his apartment, and Bal was thankful that John wasn't pissed that Jim instantly accused him of hurting Bal. John helped him find a seat, and left them to talk about what had happened, going to go watch T.V. turning off the radio when he went by it. Anthony leaned back in his chair, and ran a hand thro his hair trying to process what he had just been told, Jim was staring at his friend, and Bal 'stared' at the worn table top wondering if he should stay with John, or go back to his lonely flat. John wasn't really watching T.V., he was trying to tell himself that it would be better if Bal went back to his apartment, and if that didn't sound good maybe go with his friends, but no matter what, he couldn't stop himself from feeling like shit for becoming attached to Bal. He liked the demon, as in his attitude, and his opinions, it had been forever since John had talked to somebody other than his dead friends, or Angela, and was happy to have somebody that didn't either throw him pitiful looks, or could only stay for short periods of time. He listened to Bal talk about some of the 'punishment' he received, and how John found him, and how they wound up in the hospital everything went silent except for the T.V. droning some documentary on Honey badgers, but it was ignored.

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><p>Authors Note:Alright if you didn't get the book or T.V. references in this chapter you need help. Their is also a youtube video reference in this one.<p> 


	8. Chapter 8

"So are you staying here, or are you going with us?" Anthony asked, and heard John hiss causing him to look over at the couch, that hid the magician from their view. "I was thinking of staying here, as long as John is fine with it" Bal murmured gulping, and waited for the exorcist to speak. "I don't care it's your decision Bal" John told him trying to sound indifferent, but on the inside he was happy, and praying that he would stay another part of him was reflecting on how this was the same demon that had killed his friends, who tried to help Lucifer's son rise, but he pushed that voice down deciding that if they had such a problem with the idea, that they would say something. Bal let out a breath that he didn't know he was holding, when John said it was okay Jim smirked when he saw Bal smile at the idea of staying with John. "Okay that's set now let Anthony and I get your job back, we've been covering for you luckily nobody had asked what was going on, it will be at least a week to get everything set, but no longer than that." Jim told him looking over to the couch, were John sat who was trying to hold back his aura from them feeling how happy he was, but Jim still knew, and shook his head at the two. Anthony smiled thinking about how they were a strange pair, but was happy to have Bal back, and know he was safe from that bastard Gabriel. The Crowley brothers then left leaving John to close the door behind them, but before he could they dragged him out of his apartment, not closing the door knowing Bal would hear it, and pushed John against the wall, opposite of the door. "You hurt him we will kill you got it?" Jim growled, and Anthony narrowed his eyes at John, his glasses have slipped down the bridge of his nose to revile terrifying yellow eyes, with reptilian pupils. John smirked but nodded, looking into Jim's dark eyes without fear, and Jim smirked happy that his brother at least found someone not intimated by the two of them, but this was the same son of a bitch that faced Lucifer, and showed no fear. The men then heard Bal get up, and the brothers dropped John, and pushed him back into the apartment, and shut the door, John stood their processing what had just happened, but he turned to see Bal making his way over to the T.V., and Bal looked behind himself at John, and John let the thoughts drop instead opting to sit next to Bal, and make fun of the documentaries that played on the T.V., earning more laughter, and playful eye rolls that made John laugh.

They began to become regulars in walking in the park on days that John didn't have to work, Bal had begun to work as well, but for now worked at home mostly talking on his cell phone, and computer both set up with Braille, and text to speech software. It scared the hell out of poor John who came home one night, and the dame thing suddenly said something, John then preceded to shout curses when he feel over the couch, Bal quickly came out of the bathroom, and asked wrong his only reply was John shouting more profanities about the computer talking, causing Bal to burst out laughing. "Sorry John it just dose that it's self, I've been fighting it all day, scared the hell out of me when it began to read a webpage" Bal told him perching on the back of the couch, were John sate trying to calm his racing pulse. John chuckled, and stared at Bal clad in jeans, and an t-shirt one much too big for him, giving the demon an air of innocence that John found funny, he then caught sight of Bal's tail that now was a regular sight for John, it was laying on the back of the couch like its owner, once in a while the tip flicked or moved. "I can feel your eyes on me John" Bal teased lightly, and John smiled at him and let the demon touch his face, reading it in his own way and John practically melted at the feel of Bal's finger tips running over his lips, and nose. "Sorry" John murmured still staring at the demon as he said it, unable to look away from Bal, his hair not gelled back, stubble apparent, and in loose cloths it caused to lick his lips, and he flushed red when he realized he had accidently licked Bal's finger tips, but before he could stutter out an explanation, Balthazar straddled him, and began to kiss his jaw. "Bal!" John yelped, squirming underneath the demon, who ignored the magicians protests, knowing that this was what he wanted, and wasn't being effected by Johns emotions, but full well felt Johns lust. "Calm down John" Bal purred, and John stopped struggling but was still tense, and Bal began to rub the magicians muscles, and let his lips fall on the man's pulse, and began to nip, and lick at it causing to race. "Bal j-just I want to know that-"John was cut off of his incessant stuttering by Bal, who was grinning "It's fine John I know what I want just-" Bal stopped, his grin slowly turning to a frown, not wanting to sound like the broken fragile thing John had found, even thou he still was. "We take it slow" John said wanting the smiling, grinning, Bal back not only because then they could keep going, but also because John wanted to know that he was slowing beginning to forget the incident that stuck him here in the first place. Bal nodded, and felt Johns joy when he smiled again, probably happy to have a new toy, just happy that he didn't pull back but Bal kept the act up, wishing that they were more, but knowing he would never fully be forgiven for what he did. Before they could go back to going at each other, there was a knock on the door, and John slowly pulled himself from under the demon, that listened to the exorcist walk to the door, and opened it. John stared at Angela who smiled at him weakly, he then unlocked the door, and stepped out in the hallway, and got ready for whatever she had ready for him she then handed him a address before either could speak, Bal got up to answer his buzzing cell phone, and Angela pushed past him, and stared slacked jawed at the demon, who hadn't a clue on what was going on. Before she could freak out John dragged her back out to the hallway, a sound that caused Bal turn to the noise, but kept talking to the other person oblivious to the fight about to explode in the hallway. "What the hell is his he doing here John, I thought you killed him for good!" Angela growled, and he flinched 'Maybe the angels should've bothered her about forgiving people' he thought to himself, staring at the detective emotionlessly not really wanting to be bothered by her again. Instead of answering her question, he asked one of his own "Shouldn't you be with that asshole of a boyfriend, instead of talking to the guy that supposedly walks all over you?" he growled, and had to stop himself from smirking at the flash of hurt, and sadness in her eyes. He then turned when he heard Bal put down his phone, and start to wander over to the front door, and he just smirked when he heard Angela gasp noticing the demons powerless state. John then turned to her face once again devoid of emotion, "He can't see and has very little power, I'm taking care of him until he gets used to it or whenever" John told her turning back to Bal, who gulped, and shuffled his feet his eyes cast down in a look of fear, and despair that John instantly recognized, and wished to quell but didn't since Angela was here. Angela shuffled over to the demon, and took in his still heavily bandaged state, and she looked at him with sympathy, and then looked back at John "I'm sorry about Xavier he just…", and John finished for her "Never liked me in the first place" they then turned back to Bal, who in turn shifted under their combined gaze. John then decided to help the demon anyways, deciding that he didn't care about what Angela thought, putting his hand on Bal's lower back, and whispering in his ear "It will be fine I'm not going to let anything happen to you", paying no mind to Angela who watched the display of affection, that John had once done for her, but his hand never really went that low on her back. Bal relaxed slightly, but kept his eyes down a defense mechanism for those maybe not used to talking to a blind person, and gave a weak smile that cemented the fact that he was not himself. Angela then wondered if this was the same demon that had been near death, but yet still laughed when they fell in the trap, had been the same one to kill Beeman, and Hennesy acting as thou they were just cattle for the slaughter. "What happened I mean …uh…" Angela gulped, and shifted when Bal shivered his smile gone, and John made a gesture for her to meet him in the hallway, and she wandered their listening to John tell Bal to go relax on the couch, having to literally push him towards the couch, and watched him wander over to it then dump himself on it, with little to no grace. John, and Angela then went into the hallway, and John closed the door then turned towards her, and told her of some of the beatings, and sexual acts that happened to the demon, telling her about the bruises on his thighs, and legs, and how he was convinced that he killed John, Angela, and Chaz too. By the time he finished telling her, Angela looked a mix of being disgusted, and sad eyes now shining with unshed tears, and she was biting her lip like how Bal looked down a defensive mechanism. John then turned away, and entered the apartment but before he could close the door, Angela spoke "I'm sorry tell him that please" she then turned, and walked down the stairs, and John shook his head, and went in to calm the demon down who was curled up again.

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><p>Note: First of all thank you iceblueme (i really wish you got a account because then I could thank you properly!) and iFanboy you guys rock :) next please review and fav it helps to keep me going!<p> 


	9. Chapter 9

"Who did I kill?" Bal asked, once he was out of the quit rut Angela put him in by accident, and John flinched, hoping not to bring it up wanting to put the past behind them, but Bal seemed stuck on it like a scratched record. Unable to play but a few songs, before skipping back to that last one, John wished desperately the scratch would heal itself, but it seemed unlikely, and he knew that just wishing something away wouldn't work, he tried that a decade and more ago, with his suicide. 'How long was that ago?' John thought to himself suddenly unable to remember how long ago it was, to him now free of the sentence, it felt like a lifetime. "John… you okay?" Bal asked snapping John out of his stupor, and he stared blankly at Bal who looked sad, distant, and worried and John felt bad for making his friend, (yes friend!) worried about him, he wasn't the broken one, he wasn't the one mentally unstable (okay maybe a little but that was a matter of opinion). "I'm fine Bal-"John was cut off by Bal, "No… no… you're not" Bal practically whispered, but it was harsh, and made John flinch. He didn't talk about his feelings, because they didn't matter too much too anyone, and thus he rarely cared about others feelings. He was John Constantine asshole, an arrogant bastard that hated humanity, but yet still helped it, he faced down Lucifer, tricked him and still lived. "You killed Beeman, and Hennesy you didn't kill Chaz, Gabriel did." John told him finally really wishing for a smoke, but instead he shoved another piece of nicotine gum into his mouth. He was sure he wasn't supposed to go thru two packs a day, (sometimes more) but it didn't say anything about it. "It's not like you got out scot free" John said finally after a long pause, watching the demon pull a face that spoke of his distress, and confusion, John once again caught himself wondering where the demon was, because this was obviously not the same one he beat down, who still laughed in his face, it couldn't be. The differences too great, but as John thought about it he didn't really know the demon in the first place, everyone acted differently in public, and around people everyone had their label, everyone had their mask. When exposed like Bal was, people change, not everyone but most do, they find themselves either fearing, or enjoying every moment of their lives, and John wondered if Bal was enjoying his life, if the smiles and laughter was true, or another farce. John then decided to hell with it he might as well ask, "Bal are you happy and don't lie" John asked, the last bit rather harsh, but he ignored the fact he suddenly cared about how he said things, and hoped the demon would just speak truthfully. "I understand why you keep me …I'm entertainment…I don't understand thou, why you seemed damn determine to ask about my feelings John, they wouldn't matter anyways" Bal told him emotionlessly, and John felt he heart sank but before he could speak Bal smiled weakly, and spoke again "I enjoy your company your intelligent, and you seem okay with me being here, I just want someone here that I know isn't attached to me, so I don't hurt anyone anymore then I have" another long pause, Bal from happy to have that off his chest, and continent with things going back to the way they had been going, and John from absolute shock. There was a big problem with that thou, John wanted Bal happy, because he did really care about him but Bal seemed to want someone that just really didn't care. Should he just pretend that he didn't care about Bal, that some emotionless relationship was good, or should he blurt out that he really cared about the demon, or should he keep the act up? Bal was more or less thinking the same way, he told John that he wanted the emotionless relationship, to make it easier on the exorcist, so he didn't keep asking that damn question, but John wasn't even talking, maybe he was so happy to not have to worry about, that he was speechless?

John felt his heart race to his throat, and he wished desperately to speak, but instead he just found himself staring at the half-breed, finally he heard himself speak "You think I don't care?" John asked, the filter of what he was thinking, and what to say, broke, and putting it back up seemed impossible, as the rest fell from his lips "You killed my friends, and tried to start the apocalypse, but somehow I wound up being your friend, I really don't know how it happened, but it did and I do actually give a fuck about how you feel" John then took a deep breath, and bit his lip when he saw Bal's face, etched with shock. 'What now asshole?' a voice in Johns head sneered, and John felt himself go numb for a second, when Bal opened his mouth to speak "You're not lying." a statement, not a question. "Why lie?" John grumbled trying to piece together the mask of indifference, but absolutely failing at it, and from Bal's smile he found it amusing, John felt a flash of irritation about that, but then he saw actual happiness in his eyes, and John smiled despite himself. Bal then tilted his head, and spoke, John wondered when he began to look so damn innocent, and …John cut the thought off. "You are a strange person John" Bal told him, and John smiled. "I get away with it thou because most don't know me" John told him with a shrug, watching Bal who sat at the other end of the couch shift, and get comfortable. "Fine then tell me about yourself" Bal told him, and John stared not sure what to do, then finally spoke, before he knew it he was telling Bal about his childhood, to wandering around the world after getting out of Ravenscar, and even telling him about that time as well. John finally ended with how he meet Chaz, and then looked up at the demon, who had listened intently, once in a while they took a break, the boxes of Chinese food from their dinner spread out in front of them, they had moved to the dinner table to eat, and they still sat long after they ate their fill, the leftovers being picked at, even as they grew cold. "Remember when we first meet?" Bal asked amusement glittering in his eyes, remembering the lanky, smart ass, young man who knew everything about nothing, and how he promptly told him. Even at the age of 27, John still had some of that arrogance of a teenager, but in other ways seemed to be in his 80's, knowing the way to live, to survive even the harshest streets of the world. They often described John as too smart for his own good, and wasn't that the truth, thought Bal remembering how John took magic, and doing exorcisms in stride, how he quickly made a name for himself, among the supernatural of Los Angelis. He also later found out he was also known in Europe, from traveling over there, and helping friends over there with everything from ghost's, to coven of witches that won't leave people alone, because of this, John also spoke everything from, French to Gaelic. "I remember, it's hard to forget someone like you Bal" John laughed, watching Bal grin "Oh you're so nice John" Bal joked, knowing full well that John loathed him, until recently mostly because of their first meeting, and John chuckled. "I also remember that night you helped me get my shoes back" John laughed, and Bal chuckled "It was also are first kiss" he reminded John, causing him to chuckle.

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><p>Authors note: thank you Dragonlady2012 and the others who had review this story it means a lot and the next chapter will be about John and Bal's first kiss :3 Johns story will be elaborated on more as the story gose and their will be a hint of Bal's secret in the next chapter too. review please!<p> 


	10. Chapter 10

John yawned, and scrubbed his face with his hand, the bone deep weariness' he felt, catching up to him. 'I shouldn't feel this old when I'm only 28', John thought to himself but then again after facing, that annoying ass demon Balthazar, he went and did bunch of exorcisms to the point of collapse, hoping to throw a few of the bastards, friends down back to the pit. He lit another cigarette, and sucked the smoke deep into his lungs, and began to walk up the stairs, thinking about tomorrow, and what other jobs he could do also thinking of that strange guy Beeman, that stayed behind the bowling alley. He needed some more holy water, and also needed to pick something up for Hennesy, and knowing Beeman he had something else for him, to us on thou bastards. Once in his heavily warded apartment, John hide the money, and put his equipment away he then noticed a pair of his good boots, was missing and they hadn't been cheap, and John wondered where they had gotten too. He then looked outside, and perched out on the fire escape, was what looked like to be an angel, its wings were midnight blue, and black, with green streaks across them. The streaks of green glowed, in the dark but what confused him, was it had a tail like a demon's, with a spade shaped tip, and that to had glow in the dark green, on it. It wore a hoodie, that was similar to the rest of its color scheme, and wore black cargo pants, and old black steel toes, that had duck tape on them probably to keep them on its feet. He opened the metal shutter, and then the window, and then stuck his head out of it "Hey!" John snapped, at it causing it to look over at him, and he stared at its 'face', or well what covered its face. Like one of the old cowboys, it wore a bandana covering its nose, and down the design on it was the bottom part of a grinning cats face, the only part of its face he could see was the eyes the right one was brown, and its left was blue. Its hands were hidden, on the fact that its sleeves were too long, hiding them from Johns view, but he knew they were because they held his boots. "What the hell? Give me, my boots back!" John snapped climbing out onto the fire escape, but the creature ignored him, and jumped up to the higher part of the escape, and John followed unafraid of falling, and began to beg the creature back, mainly because he just wanted to sleep, and he told the creature that but it didn't seem to care now, the two of them were on the roof. John didn't know why but the creature was almost like the Cheshire cat, tempting him farther into wonderland but John, unlike Alice, wasn't too willing to follow the creature, but it seemed to want John to follow it. Before John could yell at it, the creature fled running on all fours like a cat, its long limbs helping propel it forward, but John having long legs himself, followed easily, jumping roof to roof. L.A. was a strange city to say the least, Balthazar thought he had seen everything, that was until tonight when a man drops, and lands in the large dumpster that all the people in his apartment used, the lid closing by its self. Banging, and cursing, followed from the trash can, and Balthazar went over, and opened it only to come face, to face with his favorite exorcist, who looked confused, then pissed "You hired her just to steal my boots, to bother me again?" John asked/yelled, glaring at the seriously confused demon. "What the hell are you talking about Johnny-boy? All I see is you, playing in the dumpster" Balthazar sneered, eyes glittering with amusement, and a smatter of annoyance. John began to sputter, but then gave up and just pointed up, and Balthazar wearily did afraid that John would do something to him, but then he saw the creature watching them, its tail swinging back, and forth amusement glittering in its eyes. Balthazar then turned back to John, "How do you know its female?" he asked, and John glared at him, and then Bal heard her giggle, causing both men look up at her, Balthazar smiled, and John glared at her. "What is she?" John asked Balthazar, but didn't really expect him to answer. "I really don't know Johnny-boy, but do you want your boots back?" Balthazar asked, looking at John who was still in the dumpster, and John nodded and began to scramble out of the dumpster, trying to get some of his pride back. "Of course I want my boots back, I really don't enjoy running around the city roofs." John snapped, glaring at the creature, and before he could register the fact Balthazar was asking if he wanted his help, Balthazar began to climb up the fire escape after the creature, and John quickly followed. "Come on just give me the bastard's boots, back." Balthazar asked the Cheshire like creature, who tilted its head but made no move to give them back, it then turned around and took off, the half-breed and man followed it, shouting curses. They finally stopped when the creature landed onto a flag pole, perched watching the men one gasping for breath, the other watching him a flash of sympathy, and worry the other didn't see. The half-breed then made his face form back to the usual smirk, and began to taunt the man, and the creature tilted its head then spoke, "Fallen angel" it caused John to look up, and Balthazar looked at it with wide eyes. John looked at it, and squinted at it, then looked over at Balthazar who put a mask on, and shrugged, and then smiled. "You full well know fallen angels aren't around anymore Johnny-boy". Balthazar then jumped out, and grabbed the pole, and John stared at the strange sight before him, Balthazar hanging onto the pole, the creature upside down on a pole above that one, and his boots hanging from around her neck. John couldn't stop his laughter, as he watched the two demons fight over the boots, or one was fighting, the other was just watching the other fight to get up, and grab the boots. Every time Balthazar got close enough, the girl would move her head just enough to keep Balthazar from touching them, causing to him growl in annoyance and shout a curse, suddenly he felt its tail wrap around him, and it threw him at John who had stopped laughing, but not smiling. When Balthazar opened his eyes, he found himself on top of John, and his lips on John's he instantly jumped off John, who began to gag and spit, and Balthazar sat stunned on what just happened. John then marched over to the edge, and jumped but landed on the top pole, and came face to fa-mask with the creature, its eyes glittered and John opened to his mouth to tell it off, but before he could, he was treated to the same treatment that Balthazar was given, but this time John landed on top, and Balthazar grabbed his collar before he could pull away, and he felt the half-breeds tongue force its way into his mouth, he growled when the demon didn't back off, then gave up, and began to kiss him back, eyes closing, and body melting into the demons embrace. To say the least Balthazar tasted of whiskey, and something John couldn't place something, John suspected was actually Balthazar's own flavor. He felt the half-breeds hands suddenly wander from his collar, to the buttons on the front of his shirt, and John pulled away feeling his face redden, and he tried to stand but Balthazar had a hold of his tie. "Fuck off Bal, I need to get my boots back-"the sound of something hitting the gravel, made John turn to see his boots on the roof not around the girls neck. Before he could go over, and grab them, Balthazar used his tie and pulled John so they were face to face, John on his knees, and straddling Balthazar who was on his back. John narrowed his eyes, and Balthazar just smirked back "Let go I just want to go home" John growled, wanting to wipe that smirk off his face, and Balthazar then grinned "And miss the pretty sunrise Johnny-boy?", Balthazar purred, and John looked to see, sure enough, he had just spent the entire night with Balthazar, who burst out laughing, at the look on Johns face.

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><p>Authors Note: Sorry for the lateness on this one it just wasn't flowing and I know this isn't funny but I'll probably change that later. I put this up just in time for Valentine's Day too :) :3<p> 


	11. Authors Note

I meant to make Two Sides of Me vary aghast filled and sort of sad but later very happy ... it didn't work out that way so I will still write and add chapters but once its finished I will start to post the more graphic and in character one. The one I am working on was sort of to stretch my ideas and sort of have it take form and also see if anybody liked it even thou it was sappy and out of character ( which people do like and thank you guys sooooo much!) I don't like this version but it is fun to write and people enjoy it so it will continue. Sorry for thous who thought this was an update I am writing the chapter as you read this an it will probably be up by Saturday night. Its midwinter break so I will be writing up a storm.


	12. Chapter 11

The room sate in a comfortable silence, both patrons thinking about that night, how they used to fight with fists, words, and anything not nailed down to the floor. More than once the two fought to the point of incoherence, they then picked themselves up, licked their wounds, and went back at it next time. There was no true hatred, just venom that stung, burned, then vanished. Anger pulled to boiling point, and then toppled emotions unleashed on the other, even thou they didn't cause them. They were each other's punching bags, nothing more, nothing less, and yet … here they sat across from each other, no venom spat, no punches thrown, and all the stuff not nailed down was were in had been put. John couldn't help but laugh, and Bal joined till they hurt from laughter, a good hurt that John wished desperately, more present in his life. As he thought about it he had been … not happy no … but continent, with the demon as a roommate, they shared cooking, and cleaning duties, they left each other alone, and their stuff. Yet they lived their lives intertwined, eating together, watching TV together, it was simple, domestic, and yet it wasn't, John worked strange hours, Bal was blind, and had a tail. Bal often used his tail on day to day activities, mostly so he wouldn't bump into the furniture, around the apartment. They were pulled out of their thoughts, by the sound of wings, and the feel of holiness that came with angels. John instantly reached over and squeezed Bal's thigh in a sign, that everything was okay. John then looked over to see just Chaz, standing next to the table, and smiling in that friendly way, that drove John up the wall. The kid always wondered why he John wouldn't let him do exorcism, and that was one of them, the kid was just too damn friendly. John wouldn't be surprised if instead of exorcising the demon, he would befriend it! He stood up but didn't move away from Bal, who whimpered obviously afraid the boy turned angel, held a grudge against him. Chaz must have heard the whimper Bal made, because he quickly told him he wasn't here to hurt him, just check on John who seeing Chaz's face, told Bal he was going to be right back. "What's up, a few weeks your gone and suddenly you-" John was cut off by Chaz grinning stupidly at him, and John pieced together what the boy was thinking "Of course I would forgive the bastard, after what happened to him-" John cut himself off this time, and he glared at the giddy Chaz. Chaz was giddy for two reasons, one John actually listened to him and forgave Bal, and two John was showing a softer side, that Chaz got to see only once in a while. John glared at him, but his glare even set that high didn't stop the boy from grinning, and for a blush to creep up his cheeks, because two things John Constantine asshole, did not do, was take orders, and feel normal human emotion. "Go to hell kid" John murmured, turning to go back into his apartment, only to come face to face with Isabel, who grinned at him too, obviously happy John was being kind to the demon, "You're so cute when you blush John" teased Isabel, giggling when it deepened. "Piss off the both of you I-" John was cut off of his rant when the two vanished, and he stomped back into the apartment, calming himself knowing he only scared Bal when he was pissed. That made him stop and think, even when he was with Angela he never tried to come home in a good mood, he did love her, hell thought life would slow down because of her, even near the end when he came home to her yelling at him, he still sort of loved her, but yet something was different with Bal. He had guessed that it was because Bal was more vulnerable, it wasn't like they never fought, they did once in a great while, but usually about stupid stuff, and never actually serious. Once again he wondered why he didn't fight with Bal, like he did with Angela he looked over at the half-breed, he didn't think of Bal as just a convenient fuck toy, or entertainment like he first presumed, and they had to be more than just friends from the quick kisses and the not so quick ones, but then just what was Bal to John?

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><p>Authors note: -_- its short ...sorry. I loved writing about Chaz ans Isabel giving John shit and John slowly beginning to realize just what he and Bal are to each other. btw I do like Angela she is a badass in her own little way but the pairing seems to make John turn into a pansy (or at least most of the ones I've read are like that) and John with Chaz are cute but once again John turns into a pansy (except one Company We Keep awesome story!). Then theirs story of these two yes but their so dark and depressing ( and don't get me started with the Mary sue oc's I've seen!) ...sorry turned into Authors rant -_-<p> 


	13. Chapter 12

**Authors Note : Warning this chapter has another reason why this story is mature if you are offended by slash 1. spoilers John and Balthazar have a heavy makeout or soft sex 2. HOW HAVE YOU GOT THIS FAR! Right so if you just dont want to read this move on to the next chapter because this one doesn't have any info that really matters. You have been warned! **

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><p>Bal was lost in his own thoughts, but then he spoke, his fear having resided a little, so he could speak. "What was that about?" he asked, and heard John chuckle, and move over to the couch, and sitting on it. "They just like giving me shit, before you came to stay and after Angela broke up with me, they were sorta my only contacts for a while" John told him, and Bal's eyebrows knitted together in confusion, "You broke up with Angela?" and John said yes, and went to explain "I broke up with her before all this, she came to say sorry for her now boyfriend, punching me". Bal flinched, and felt John reach out and touch his thigh, and Bal relaxed then mused about that, while John began to look for something on the TV, his hand still resting on Bal's thigh, his thumb once in a while moving, to stroke it. Bal at first hated contact with John, and he knew it yet slowly he enjoyed the contact John gave him, whether touching his hair, arm, or thigh, Bal began to pray for it. It wasn't just lust, thou it got close sometimes when John was feeling playful, and tease Bal while on the phone, running his hand up Bal's thigh, and between his legs, hissing jeers into Bal's ear, or sometimes he would massage Bal's back which was fine, until John would get lower and tease the small patch of scaly skin around were his tail meet his body. The first time he did it was on accident, he had been kneading at Bal's spine, something that was on the perfect line of pain and pleasure, when he got close to his tail thou it made Bal yelp, and John had to muffle his hysterical laughter, while Bal told whoever it was that he hit his toe. Bal got off the phone and literary tackled John on to the couch, and Bal got to listen to the real laughter of John Constantine, a sound Bal was falling in love with, but as he thought about it more, Bal thought maybe it wasn't just the way John laughed, teased, or comforted him, that he was in love with John himself. That thought made him shift in discomfort, Bal knew John cared about him, but as a friend, and Bal didn't want to ruin that by saying anything. A sudden moan caught his attention, and he raised an eyebrow at that, then smiled when he heard John curse, and flip though a bunch of dirty movies. Bal snickered as John got more frantic, finally giving up, and shutting the TV off grumbling something incoherent about bad television, causing Bal to burst out into laughter. He felt John's playful glare but it just increased his mirth, John then gave up the ghost, and laughed too Bal then laid his head down on Johns shoulder, trying to get his breath back while John did the same. "That sounded like a ten cent porn" Bal told John bluntly, and caused the magician to snicker "It looked like a ten cent porn, you're lucky thou" John told him, and was happy to feel Bal smile into his shoulder. They sat there, Bal enjoying the close proximity he had with John at the moment, and John mulling over the movies he had tried to flip by and failed to do so, of the movies one of them had caught his attention. He tried to get the image of the two men out of his head, but it stuck, and caused a reaction John defiantly didn't want Bal to notice. "Want to listen to the radio, it has to be safer then the TV" Bal told John, snapping his mind out of the gutter, and John nodded the movement felt instead of seen, but still processed. Neither moved thou whether laziness, or comfort, it didn't matter, and before John knew it Bal's breath had evened out, as was his and soon the two of them were lost into the oblivion of sleep. John woke up groggy, but relaxed and found himself alone on the couch, John instantly jumped from the couch fear, and panic tightening his chest only to see Bal on the phone again, the fifteen minute nap cut off by work. John smiled at Bal's face, a mixture of exasperation and annoyance that John loved dearly to wipe off his face, by gentle teases, and teasing words. It still made him chuckle that Bal hadn't learned his lesson in letting John touch him while on the phone, because no matter how many times John had made him gasp, growl, or even once moan, Bal never made him really stop. John pretended to get a glass of whisky, and decided to get one for Bal who mouthed thank you at John, who then stooped to tell Bal it was whisky who hummed in reply, and looked over at John, and their lips brushed. John heard Bal gulp, and found himself doing the same, Bal then stuttered into the phone the answer, and then hung up John hadn't moved, on that, he wanted to see just how far this got. Bal eyes then stayed down the hazel brown John had become accustomed too, then the red brown they were when Bal was more demon than man, fascinated John. John then pressed their lips together, soft like the rest had been, and a little hesitant but neither pulled away, John fascinated by the electricity that coursed throe him, and Bal because he didn't want to seem like a coward. Bal felt pleasure slowly unfurl in his stomach, and purred when John carded his hand throe Bal's dirty blond hair, than yelped onto the kiss when John arm slid around his waist, John pulled back and murmured that it was okay, and then picked Bal up easily, Bal still rather thin from the torture, and set him onto the table so they were face to face, and then kissed Bal again. John slowly lapped at Bal's mouth who opened easily, but then before John could slither is tongue into Bal's mouth, Bal forced his tongue into Johns mouth. Johns head spun while Bal's forked tongue dominated his mouth, finding every nook and cranny, teasing John till his knees shook and couldn't think straight. John pulled back eyes wide, and breathing coming out in pants, and Bal smirked at the sounds, a sight that sent pleasurable bolts throe John and he dove back in, Bal instantly opening to Johns demanding tongue, and loving the way the exorcist lapped at his mouth then teasing Bal by running his hands over his body, and Bal did the same in retaliation. His breath hitched when John teased the scales on his lower back, then John pulled back and Bal nodded, wanting John to resume who gladly did, Bal moaning into the sloppy kiss, when John swirled his finger around Bal's tail. They pulled back, and John moaned at the sight of Bal ruffled, and knees nearly gave out when Bal's forked tongue came out, and moisten his lips, swollen from kissing. John then began to nip, and lightly bite Bal's neck, quickly finding it was a sensitive spot for the demon, who writhed and moaned at the attention from the exorcist, who felt his arousal worsening with every moan, and gasp Bal made. Bal quickly found Johns lower back was like his, sensitive, and oh so fun to tease, and Bal wished to see Johns face, but decided that touching the other male was enough for him, that and John panting his name slightly. They then pulled away from each other, John on knowing Bal couldn't go too much farther, and not wanting to push him farther or, risk the demon collapsing onto himself in fear. Bal then yelped when John picked him up again, and glared at the magician who chuckled once they were safely on the couch, and Bal found he was sate on John's lap, and his straining erection. Bal shifted, and smirked when he heard John hiss, and his hands clamp onto Bal's waist, the hands thou did nothing but tell him John was loving the way he gyrated his hips, more or less dry humping the man beneath him enjoying the choked sounds of pleasure, John made. "Jesus Bal" John bite his bottom lip to stop another groan from escaping his lips, but Bal then kissed him all tongue, teeth, and desperation, that John quickly found as intoxicating as Bal's scent, and broke his already doomed silence. Bal quickened his pace, as the pressure in his lower stomach and groin grew, also feeling as John began to meet his thrust as his own release began to dawn on him. Tongues began to twist with one another, groans reaching to a volume that the neighbors would surly hear, bodies writhed, and fingers roamed alien bodies, drawing gasps moans from each other, only driving each other closer to the edge of oblivion. Fingers and tongues sought areas sensitive to touch, making bodies writhe and thrust faster, John then groaned and arched and Bal moaned as his own release washed over him, the two men sate their trying to just breath at the moment. when Bal chuckled. "What?" John asked starting to stroke Bal's hair rising, a purr from him, "A year and a half ago if somebody told me I was going to be living with you, and enjoy it I would've called them crazy" Bal told him, and smiled a little wider at the chuckled it earned.<p> 


	14. Chapter 13

John couldn't blame him on that, because if someone told him that he wouldn't just call them crazy, he would've punched them. John then shifted, then flinched and decided it was time for a shower, and from the way Bal shifted it cemented the fact they needed a shower. Bal felt himself dragged to the bathroom, John not going to fast so Bal wouldn't trip over something, or hit his toes. Neither spoke as they stripped, John trying to remember the last time he did something like this, and Bal trying to keep his mind off the sound of running water, the sound still dragging bad memories with it. Bal jumped when John touched him and both apologized, causing to John chuckle, brushing a arrant curl from Bal's face. The shower was slow, but far from sexual they then got out and Bal waited for John to come back with some cloths, when he did John told him they needed to do the wash, which meant they needed to go for a walk, something Bal didn't mind. Soon the two were walking side by side, Bal waited at a table in the front of the laundry mat, for John to get their cloths washing so they could pick up some groceries as well, John told him go back to the store for the blind a pick up some books for him, now bought on Bal's credit card he got for such purchases. Jim and Anthony had not only got him his job, back but also told him of where they had put his stuff, when the apartment people gave his flat to someone else. They had also brought him his suits for work, and Bal gagged at the thought of wearing them again, feeling like that wasn't really him anymore, happy that even thou he changed his friends didn't seem to mind. His memory seemed to have also followed his powers, lost to oblivion or maybe just stored somewhere, so the brothers explained some things to him he had first been pissed when they had told him of certain things, then really explained them. He was happy John had gone on a job when he did, because he didn't know if he could tell John the truth, Anthony tried to convince him to tell John and Jim was the same way, but they stopped when they realized just how much he cared about John, and that Bal wanted to protect him from such things. The one thing they all bonded over was that when it came to love they sucked, both Crowley brothers had fallen for angels, but out of fear of the angles falling, because they loved the demons, back fled their love's, making a home in L.A. with their older brother Balthazar. The door opened with a ding causing Bal's thoughts to stop, and he heard the sound of claws on the tailed floor of the laundry mat, Bal then heard John walk over to the table were Bal sat, and told him that they were ready to go. "Did somebody bring a dog into the laundry mat?" Bal asked and John told him yeah, that it was a guide dog, surprise evident in his voice on the fact Bal had heard that. After a long pause John spoke, "You know as long as the damn things behaves, I wouldn't mind you having a guide dog around" Bal nodded seeing that it was a good idea, it would save him a lot of trouble. "You can stop holding my hand then" Bal joked, an John snorted know Bal would soon have to do things on his own, and the guide dog would help the half-breed, "I guess it would be a good idea" Bal said. They were soon at the shop, after picking up a few groceries and moving the cloths around at the laundry mat, Bal went to look at the books, and John went to talk to Kristie a nice older women who ran the store, and was helped by her two grand children, and children at times. Toby the boy was fascinated by the blind demon, who tried to talk to the child but Toby was shy and run away, today was no different and his grandmother was too busy talking to John, to tell Toby to leave Balthazar alone. Bal smiled when he felt the child staring at him, he decided to be friendly like he usually was and "looked" over to the child who gasped, but didn't move away. "Can you read Braille?" Balthazar asked the boy who nodded but of course the action wasn't seen and after a while of silence Bal chuckled "I can't see pal so do you mind talking?" Bal asked, and the boy choked out that he could read Braille. "I'm still learning so do you mind telling me what this last word is?" Bal asked crouching down, and the boy slowly moved over to him. The boy then told him the last word was Wonderland, and Bal thanked him soon the boy and him were slowly chatting about books, when John came over and told Bal that there was a kennel out back. Instantly the boy brightened, and began to talk about all the dogs and how good they were and the two men chuckled at the boy's sudden eagerness, to talk to them. John and Bal, were soon outside in the lawn behind the store, some dogs were lazing in the shade, or playing various games that both kept them preoccupied, and showed their abilities. One dog who had been playing caught sight of John and Bal, and instantly went over to the pair, Bal jumped when it's cold nose hit his hand, but then Bal smiled and pat its head, and the dog was soon contently panting, enjoying the attention given to it by Bal and John, who after some time began to pet the dog too. "Her name is Faith" Toby told them, smiling and petting the dog too. John soon set everything up, and they were walking home, Faith by Bal's side and he couldn't help but smile when he felt John still nearby, the trio were soon home and John watched the dog open cupboards, and put things away. "This is insane" John murmured watching the dog put away groceries, and Bal chuckled, after that John got a call from Midnight, who had a job for him. "Will you be okay here?" it was a question that John always asked on the few times he had a job, and Bal always said the same thing "I'll be fine John", but now he pointed out that Faith was there to keep him company. John looked at the dog who wagged its tail, as thou to tell John that it was happy to keep Bal company, and John sighed but went to get ready for the job. When John came back from the job he found Bal asleep on the couch, the night have descended onto LA, and causing the demon to fall asleep on the couch were he slept, after having calmed enough after John saved him. John got closer but a growl stopped him, and he found that Faith indeed kept Bal company, and now lay on top of Bal, but then John saw the dogs tail wag once it realized it was just John. "Hey girl keeping Bal safe?" John murmured, patting the dogs head causing her tail to wag, and John couldn't help but smile lightly, when he saw the demon. You wouldn't think he was a demon, thou he looked so angelic, and calm his head resting on the arm of the sofa and his hand, mouth open a bit, and eyes moving behind the thin lids. John reached down and brushed a curl from the demons face, and jumped when Bal's eyes opened, smiled, and a purr rose from his throat. "Sorry Bal I didn't mean to wake you up" John murmured, and Bal chuckled and reached up and touched his face, and John closed his eyes, and let Bal run his fingers over his face, kissing Bal's wrist when it got close enough. Bal shivered at the feel of Johns lips on his skin, and began purring louder when a tongue darted out, and lapped at the vein. "Hmmm John" Bal groaned tangling his hand into Johns hair, causing him to lower himself towards Bal and to nip at his neck. Bal just as he thought it couldn't get better, was snapped out of it by a memory Gabriel doing the same thing Bal, trying to pry her off with a hand in her hair. Bal's tightened his grip in Johns hair to the point of pain, and John stopped kissing Bal's neck that snapped Bal into reality, and Bal felt like he was going to cry, and started to babble apologies, and let John go. He expected John to get angry, but instead Bal heard John walk over, and felt him sit on the couch, then he pulled Bal into his lap and listen to him murmur soothing words into his ear. Bal felt shame, and anger rise, making tears sting his eyes, and bile burn his throat, why did he have to be so weak apparently the question slipped from his lips, because John told him that he wasn't weak, and should stop saying that. They fell asleep on the couch, like they had done earlier that afternoon.

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><p>Authors note: Sorry about the lateness on this one ironically the same reason I'm neglecting my writing is so I can do it over the spring break coming up. And yes Faith is staying so expect her to shake up our favorite demon and exorcists life ^^ I really don't know what all guide dogs can do I I'm going to look that stuff up and if you know anything note me or whatever, Review please :) and all I own is Faith<p> 


	15. Chapter 14

**_Once again a warning on the fact their is sex male on male in this chapter! Authors _****_Note's_** : Really late on this chapter... this one was being evil and were once the plot bunnies were many now their are few or fleeting but this will continue! This story is also coming to a close and I will begin to write the more in character and darker one. I am also starting a new story to keep you guys entertained :) It will have one-sided Chastine (Chaz/John) a little Angeltine (Angela/John) but later Bal/John :)

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><p>John woke up with stiff muscles, but the weight in his lap, and the scent of Bal nearby made it worth it. Faith was next to them, keeping a silent vigil over the two of them, and John smiled and pet her, and then John remembered that they should've gotten dog food but for this morning, he guessed she could just have some eggs or something else. Bal shifted and John bit his bottom lip, 'Jesus when did I become such a pansy, the mere scent of Bal getting me fucking aroused' but as John thought of, it wasn't actually new. Bal drove him up the wall like this since he met the half-breed, he seemed to know how to push all the right buttons for John, to get him in a mixed emotion of lust, and anger, more than once John didn't know whether to kiss, or punch the half-breed. He chuckled finally understanding why Ellie always teased him about having a boyfriend, why when she ever split them up she told them to go, and fuck each other already. John flinched about how she had hissed at him when he accidently went up to the bar, forgetting it was her night to work, a few days after the Mammon thing. He wondered what she and Midnight have been up too since that one day, John never really went to Midnights bar it had first been because he was with Angela, and trying to get her used to half-breeds, then it was because it had been because he had been drowning himself in alcohol, now it was because of Balthazar. Not that he had any friends that really hung out there, most of his friends were dead, or in different states, or countries. Bal took a deep breath, signaling that he was waking, and John murmured that he was sorry for waking him, and Bal just murmured back that it was okay.<p>

"You start the coffee, and I start some eggs and bacon?" John murmured, and smiled when Bal instantly perked up at the thought of food. Both he and John were gaining weight slowly back, from the torture done to their bodies; they also kept in shape by walking almost everywhere they went. Soon the three were eating breakfast, when a knock on the door caused John to go answer it, he was still in his suit from last night while Bal had changed into a new suit, and took a shower. John opened the door to see the Crowley brothers both in pristine suit's, and well groomed and John felt like an idiot, he felt worse when Bal kissed him on the cheek, and left for work, Faith licking his hand as thou imitating her master, and heading out as well. Jim grinned, and John growled at him, and slammed the door in the demons face, trying to ignore the laughter it caused. John heard Anthony scold Jim, and John couldn't stop the grin that took place of his scowl, because seriously he would ever believe such a thing would be going on. Jim caught up to Bal, still smiling and Anthony chuckled, causing Bal to raise an eyebrow at the pair "What now, do I need to go and tell John not to kill you?" Bal asked, and Jim chuckled, and pet Faith who wagged in appreciation.

"No just the kiss on the cheek, and you three eating breakfast together it's so ….domestic, it's nice to see you happy" Jim told him, and Bal smiled and rolled his eyes, but knew that his brother was being truthful, he really cared for Bal. They walked to the office, they worked at and soon the three split up, and Bal stopped completely in his tracks, because he hadn't been back, in the building since he got back on earth, and was afraid of …what, he didn't know, but that didn't stop the fear from rising. Faith whined, snapping Bal out of the trance his fear stuck him in, and smiled and pet the dog, telling her that he was fine.

"Mr. Stone?" a voice that was familiar, and timid spoke up, and Bal remembered that it was the sectary, and he smiled and nodded, then asked if she could open the door, and she heard her go and open the door, and Faith lead him inside the office. The day went by without much trouble, and Bal was surprised when John's voice drifted into his office, Kathy the secretary, buzzed in, telling him a man named John Constantine wanted to talk to him, he quickly told her to let him in. John came in, and Faith instantly greeted him with licking, and tail wagging, and he smiled and pet her, then greeted Bal by kissing him on the cheek, payback for this morning, and because he had desperately wanted to touch the demon all day. Bal smiled, and chuckled, not at all minding the peck on the cheek, and smiled grew a little when Kathy coughed, and muttered that she would leave the two alone. As soon as the door shut, Bal pulled John into a brain melting kiss, tongue, and teeth including, raising a little moan from his throat, and Bal smiled against his lips, but didn't stop completely breaking the speech portion in his brain. They pulled back and John murmured that he missed Bal, who smiled and told him that he needed to work, and John made a disrespecting sound that made Bal laugh.

"When are you coming home?" John asked, and Bal told him that he will be able to leave soon, and John told him that was great, then Bal heard John sit in his chair he was about to tease John, who suddenly grab and made him sit in Johns lap. "John" Bal warned, who began to nip his neck, and massage his lower back. "God Johnny" Bal groaned, when Johns fingers dipped into the waistband of his slakes, and began to tease the scales, that went even lower. "You haven't called me Johnny in forever" John murmured, and Bal was about to apologies, knowing that the John didn't like the nickname he gave, when they were the worst of enemies. Before he could thou, John whispered gruffly into his ear "I always loved when you called me that, it drove me up the wall …you, drove me up the wall" and Bal shivered, at the exorcist tone, and words. Bal began to rock on Johns lap, who put his hands on Bal's hip but didn't stop nipping and licking Bal's neck, and Bal shivered when John moaned against his neck. "K-keep it down Johnny, or we'll be c-caught" Bal stuttered, but John smiled at the teasing tone their, and began to grind back, when the pressure built in his groin. Bal bit his lip when John bit just below his hair line, and nibbled at the bone he felt there and grinded on the magicians lap harder, gasping when one of Johns hand crept from his hip, to his groin. "Really, am I being the loud one?" John teased, rubbing between Bal legs, enlighten a choked pleasured sound from him, and Bal hissed in annoyance, when John chuckled. "I'm shaking in my boots, big bad demon hissing at me" John teased, nipping at Bal's ear, enlighten a growl from the demon, and John chuckled again, knowing there was nothing behind it. John knew, from the way that Bal groaned into his lap, and bit back his moans. Suddenly the buzz that told Bal, that Kathy was paging him, went off, but John held him, just out of reach of the phone, and Bal growled "J-john let g-go", and John snickered. "Or what, the big bad demon going to hurt me" John teased and Bal whined, actually whined, and John let Bal answer it. John had to stop himself from laughing when Bal answered rather breathlessly, and it turned out to just be the Crowley brothers, and Bal told them to come in, Bal then remembered he was sitting on John lap, and stood up only to feel the blood rush to his legs, and groin. John chuckled, seeing the look of discomfort on his face, and he took off into the bath room, and John leaned back in the chair, and smiled at the brothers, who raised a eyebrow at the sight of the magician, and the absence of their brother. "He went to the bathroom he'll be out in a second", John told them with a smile, then as if cued Bal came out of the bathroom, and seemed less…stressed then he went in. "Hey you guys want to go to dinner?" Anthony asked, and John stared at him, he half expected Bal or Jim to say no, but they were silent, John told him sure and soon the four of them (five counting Faith), were off to dinner.

John chuckled as Bal started humming, a tune he couldn't quite place. The demon wasn't plastered, but was nicely buzzed, and is showed by the way he stumbled slightly, lucky he let Faith go, so she could stay away from his uncooperative feet. "Defiantly had enough" Bal grumbled, and smiled when he heard John chuckle, and walk towards him and Bal raised an amused eyebrow, when John wrapped his arms around Bal's waist.

"We all had a fair share" John purred, into Bal's ear, and Bal smiled and rested his head on Johns shoulder, baring his neck to the exorcist, who nipped, and lapped at it after a while. "You owe me after this afternoon" Bal grumbled, and he felt John smile against Bal's neck, flicking his tongue out against Bal's Adams apple, smiling when the demon moaned a little. John stepped back, and peeled off Bal's suit jacket then took off his own, and threw both onto the sofa, a woof caused him to look over only to see Faith had jumped onto the sofa, and now was covered by the jackets. John burst out laughing the alcohol making his head swim, and Bal asked what, and Bal chuckled when John told him. Once John, and Bal stopped laughing, John began to untie Bal's tie, while Bal looked for John's knot, not mind helping the demon, when he began to get frustrated. Bal smiled at the patients John was showing for him, making him feel loved, and began too purr, telling John that he wasn't scared. John then un-tucked Bal's shirt, and began to unbutton it too, Bal was soon doing the same to John, "We'll take it slowly okay" John told Bal, who nodded the liquid courage starting to wear off, but was sure he wanted to do this. Dinner had gone without a hitch even in the end, when they were pretty buzzed they caused no trouble for the wait staff, or other patrons a few of them even began to talk with them, and John once again showed his intelligent, by keeping up, and discussing politics. Bal knew John was intelligent, but wasn't sure if it was just on getting out of tight spots, but the demon quickly found himself dumfounded with Johns views, even if a little skewed, and indifferent. Bal didn't blame him thou humanity seemed to have labeled John a criminal, and nutcase, no wonder John rather hang around the unusual, or inhuman. "Leader of the dammed and unwanted" Bal murmured a sudden memory hit him like a train, but John began to nip at his collar bone, and all thought went out the window, and John didn't ask, or didn't hear him. "I knew you were talented with your tongue Johnny, but thissss" Bal hissed, the last word on account John's nipping became harsher, but was still pleasant. Soon the pant's of both men followed the jackets, shirts, and ties, and John let Bal run his hands over his chest, moaning, then jumping when Bal's hand's ran his hands, over his sides. "Ticklish here Johnny?" Bal purred, stepping forward pressing their chests together, and John opened his mouth to retort, but Bal cut him off by kissing him deeply, groaning when Bal began to tease the crease of his ass. John then suddenly remembered that Bal was holding his head with his hands, and wondered what was currently teasing his crack, then he remembered the tail. John felt his knees weaken, when the tail began to circle his hole putting pressure on it then letting up, and finally it began to breach his passage. 'Hell Bal" John groaned, pulling back Bal then wrapped his arm around Johns waist, and pulled John to him, and began to nip his collar bone, Bal's lips and tongue then found his nipple, and the tip of Bal's tail finally entered him. Johns boxers dropped, and Bal's hand went down his face, to his neck, and slowly made their way to his stiffening cock, Bal then shimmied out of his boxers too, and pressed their lengths together, raising moans from both men. John's hand began to travel Bal's own body, teasing the demons nipples, pinching, and rolling them between his fingers, smiling when Bal moaned into the now sloppy, yet still enjoyable kiss. Their tongues were playing with each other, teeth once in a while clashed, moans and groans exchanged between the men's connected mouths, they finally pulled back, and saliva connected their mouths. Johns hands were now on Bal's hips, and Bal's hands were on Johns thighs, and began to creep to his aching cock, John bit his lip when Bal began to lightly touch him, then his knees nearly gave out, when Bal's tail found his prostate. "Jesus Bal p-please ah-h shit" John choked, and groaned when Bal's tail began to constantly stimulate his prostrate, and took revenge by fisting and lightly jerking Bal off, who groaned at the attention his own cock that starting to leak precum. Johns knees that had been on the way to giving out finally did. when Bal's tail began to move, and he began to jerk Johns twitching leaking cock, but Bal just followed him whether because his knees too gave, John was unsure. The sound level of the two men had turned rather high, but John was sure the neighbors were either deaf, or weren't there anymore, his was distracted from any more thought by Bal's tongue tangling with his, and the battle of dominance that followed, that drove John even closer to oblivion. The rhythm was now lost, as they began to pull on each other's dicks faster, and Bal's tail writhed, and squirmed, short circuiting Johns nerves and finally pushing him over the edge, pulling Bal with him when his muscles rippled around his tail intoxicatingly. John stared at the ceiling, and couldn't keep the smile off his face, twice Bal had shown him a good time, and from the loud purring coming from the demon John guessed Bal enjoyed it too. John suddenly felt something wet and warm crawl across his stomach, making him gasp, then he realized it was Bal's forked tongue, that lapped at Johns semen covered stomach. "Jesus Bal you want to go another round?" John murmured, starting to notice just how hard he fell, and how hard the floor was, he was definitely going to be sore tomorrow. "What's the matter Johnny?" again with the nickname, the way Bal said it made his cock twitch. "Starting to feel your age?" Bal purred, dragging his index finger throe the cum still on Johns stomach, and he sucked the finger into his mouth, causing John to moan at the sight. "Well I know your getting better" John grumbled, but the smile ruined the look that he was going for, as for Bal he heard, and felt Johns amusement and joyfulness, and decided that maybe, John didn't mind his old attitude too much. Bal stood, and pulled John to his feet, and then they made their way to the bathroom. "Sex in the shower?" John asked, and Bal just smiled, and shrugged, but from the way John followed, the demon guessed that the idea wasn't too bad on his part. Bal started the shower, while John went to grab something from his bedroom, when he came back he found Bal standing, and testing the water, and John went behind him, and began to trace the tattoos on Bal's back. The biggest one, was a tribal lion, with a sword in its paws, and a apple in its jaws, the rest were in various dead, or demon language, either way Johns couldn't read them Bal shivered, but mostly out of excitement, for what was about to come. He turned around and kissed John, who opened his mouth letting the demons tongue dominate and destroy whatever it pleased, moaning when Bal pressed the full length of his body to Johns, the semen making it slick. "Hmmmm Johnny" Bal groaned, as the exorcist began to nip at his neck when he found he couldn't control the kiss, instead took to using his mouth on his demon another way. Bal loved that his exorcist took charge, even cheating sometimes Bal may of came off as a dominate but in reality didn't mind just taking orders but he wasn't one to follow blindly. Bal realized the irony of that while in his current state and the fact John was dragging him and he wasn't fighting back but then again he trusted John with anything. John pulled Bal into the shower his hands moving down to squeeze the perfect cheeks of Bal ass enlighten a gasp from him and John once again began the fight to dominate the kiss. Soon the two of them were wrapped in each other's arms mouths locked together and the warm water poured on them. Johns arm then slid down to behind Bal's knees and slid him up so Bal's legs were wrapped around his waist not stopping the kiss groaning when Bal's tail began to fuck him again. John pulled out of the kiss and looked over to where he had put the lube and squirted it on his fingers then went back to kissing Bal who bite his lip when Johns slick fingers found his puckered opening. Bal murmured a apology but John just kissed him again showing that he didn't care the least "Shhhh its fine Bal I'm here I'm not going to hurt you" John told him slowly wriggling his finger into Bal's passage and John groaned when Bal's tail found that spot that drove John closer to release. At first it hurt and John murmured words of comfort to Bal who arched when the second finger found the same spot Bal's tail was currently abusing on John. Bal whined when John took his finger out but John took it as a good sign and lined himself up too Bal who began to beg John just to do it. John went it slowly at first but saw Bal's pleasure turn to pain and thrust the rest of the way in not wanting the pain to fester and was happy to hear Bal's pained whimpers turn to groans of pleasure. "Please oh please Johnny just fuck me" Bal moaned and John began to thrust into Bal's tight passage groaning at the feeling of Bal around him slowly loosening as John began to pick up the pace. Soon any pain was gone when John hit that spot with a few more well aimed thrusts and Bal was screaming in pleasure John soon the same way as the tail inside him began to wriggle and slither. As the two of them coupled they found each other's mouths their world down to the movements of the other the way John felt in Bal and Bal's tail thrust and fucked John. John felt as the tails thrusts became more erratic his were no better but it didn't really matter. Bal arched and came the way his muscles rippled intoxicatingly around Johns erection finally pushing him over the edge his knees buckling when Bal's tail slid out of his passage. The two of them sat in each other arms' just breathing the water was now luke warm but neither cared Bal finally spoke "Thank you John" Bal murmured surprised when Johns chuckled "Trust me Bal I loved doing that and I love you" John murmured but then realized what he said but before he could recant his words Bal smiled and kissed John then pulled back. "I love you to Johnny-boy my Johnny-boy" Bal purred and John smiled and kissed Bal soon the two of them got out of the shower and slid into Johns- no John corrected himself their bed. John fell asleep listening to Bal purring and spooning his demon a smile still on his face.


	16. Chapter 15

John knew that nothing was ever really happily ever after, but for now John was happy living day by day, with Bal. They would spend entire days with each other, or spend nights with each other, lost in pleasure, or sometimes they spent entire nights just holding each other, something John was at first unsure about, but got used to the idea the more they did it. John tried to ignore the times when Bal would seem to lose himself in returning memories, or when he came home and Bal, and his friends would instantly stop talking. John didn't suspect that it was anything against him, because when Bal asked, he would tell John that it was painful too talk about, and John knew there was no way Bal was that good of an actor, if he was planning to kill, or maim, or sell him to Lucifer, he'd know but it still hurt, knowing that Bal refused to talk about it. John wasn't the only one either, John more than once came home to Bal chasing the brothers out of the apartment, because they had pissed him off. One time John chased them out, because Bal had lapsed into his usual, 'crawl in a corner and make myself small' faze, and John snapped, he didn't raise his voice but it defiantly got the message across, and the two walk out with their tails between their legs begging forgiveness, John had at the time refused to give. Of course thou the good outnumbered the bad, something that wasn't the same with Angela, John found himself in a better mood, but all the trouble causing demons of LA saw was that the Great John Constantine was back, and doling out more tickets to hell, than ever. John loved the times the Crowley brothers would come over and they would play poker, or would go out and eat at resrants, or sometimes they would just sit around John's apartment, and talk. So it came to a complete surprise, when he came home to find Bal packing the small amount of stuff he had, into boxes Jim was glaring at him, and Anthony was being moderator, as soon as John walked in, Bal began to explain why he was leaving. "I feel bad about not telling you everything John, and I can't for the safety of not only myself, and my brothers but you too" John was numb, as Bal told him this and Bal went over and cupped John face, in his hands and pressed his lips to Johns, it was over too fast too soon the same way Bal was gone. Chaz glared at his boss from above, who just stood there in shock, not going after his love, his soulmate, a sudden sob caused him to turn around to see a bunch of angels watching the spectacle, like humans would watch soap opera. Chaz glared at them, and they slunk off, and Chaz went back to glaring at his stupid boss who reached for a forgotten bottle of whisky, and Chaz went to go down, and help his now depressed boss. It was Friday, two weeks after Bal left when John saw him again, he was racing out to get to a exorcism in the suburbs, ignoring the bell going off in his head that it sounded familiar. Bal stood there, a pile of cloths in his hands, and the pair of boot that he wore most of his time while staying with John, Faith tackled John, and licked him, and John couldn't help the smile that showed on his face. "Faith get off John" Bal snapped, but Faith for once didn't listen to her master, seeing the master's mate again was nice, and she hoped that they would live together again, since her master just moped around, without his mate by his side. John looked up at Bal, and felt his heart break then remembered the exorcism in the suburbs, and cussed jumping to his feet, John told Bal who said he would go with, and John said nothing, and they jumped into the car John had bought. Soon the three of them were in the car, John driving, Bal riding shotgun, and Faith in back happy as a clam in back, unable to feel the awkwardness, that was so dense in the air of the car. "I still love you" Bal told John quietly who knew it was true, but said nothing not quite sure what to say at this point, but instead of speaking just reached over, and took Bal's hand in his own. They were soon at the suburb John was needed at, and John went inside leaving Bal outside too comfort the distraught mother, and father, the sister a mere toddler, and Bal asked polite questions, trying to calm, and give the air a fake sense of peace to calm the family. John came out, and told them their son was fine, and just sleeping at the moment, the wife took the little girl, said good-bye to Bal, and went into the house, but the husband stayed outside. He stared at John eyebrows knotted together, then he spoke "What's your name again?" the man asked, and John told him, and the man looked at him with wide eyes, "So your related to the Constantine's across the street right?" he asked pointing to the home across the street. Bal felt John's panic, and realization, John stood stock still, and Bal went towards him to try, and snap John out of the trance he was put in, on realizing this was where he grew up. "Wait Johnny ah come on don't tell me you don't recognize me!" The man laughed shaking John, and Bal flinched at the booming laughter from the man. "We used to play hockey together!" the man told him, and John looked at him closely, then jaws dropped when he realized it was Jeremy Davidson, a boy who was like a little brother too him. John gave a weak smile still in shock, laughing lightly and hysterically, as he said "Finally hit that damn growth spurt huh?" and Jeremy laughed again, slapping John on the back knocking the air out of Johns lungs. Right before either the three men could speck, a feminine voice yelled out "John Isaac Constantine where the hell have you been!"

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><p>Authors note: Short and sappy :( sorry I nearly cried when Bal left geez I'm a sap but you'll soon be finding out Bal's reason and well the next chapter might be the last...Oh and you get to meet Johns family next chapter. Also the more in character and darker one it in progress right now so keep a look out for that one :)<p>

Differences between the two? 1) more in character 2)longer and include mpreg but don't worry it doesn't last long and nobody really changes from it 3) more in depth torture and sex 4) many more crossovers and characters 5) more camos from other movie and comic book characters 6) oc's 7) more plot

Later and Goodnight and still don't own these characters


	17. Chapter 16

John felt his stomach drop, at the sound of the voice, because no matter what he would always, remember that voice. Bal tilted his head at the voice, and was surprised when John stepped towards him, as thou the blind demon, could protect him. Faith yipped playfully, and Jeremy smiled,, and pat her on the head and waved at none other than Cheryl Constantine, green eyes blazing with anger, and John gulped because she had a right too. Seventeen years since she had last seen him, but she would always recognize thou brown eyes, and scraggly black mop of hair she didn't see Bal, until she was practically in Johns face.  
>She smiled at him but it didn't get a response, and she looked at him confused when John spoke up, "He's blind Cheryl" then wished he could sink into a puddle, when her green eyes turned back to him, fire alight again. Jeremy had gave a hasty good-bye, and retreated to his family and son, and John wondered where the fearless kid that on more than one accession, nearly got killed for his bravery, went. He looked back into his sisters eyes, and saw hurt their, and flinched, all sincerity had been beat out of him from the cruel world he thrust himself into, but lately Bal was slowly putting it back together, even their breakup didn't get rid of it, and now it screamed at him for not keeping contact with his sister, the only one who cared for him even in the hospital, and even snapping at her didn't drive her away. "Can I explain?" John asked, and Cheryl glared at him, then turned to Bal who had stood motionless, and speechless during this whole interaction between brother, and sister wondering if he should call a cab, and let them figure out the mix of emotions currently swimming around him.<br>Before he could cement the idea thou Cheryl spoke, "You must be a friend of John's I'm his older sister Cheryl" she told him, and Bal smiled and introduced himself "You should come and see the parents again Johnny we missed you, and Bal would probably love moms cooking" Cheryl told them, John stood their gaping but Bal spoke first " I would love to me your parents" Bal told her, and grinned at John who stared wide eyed at Bal, who smirked at him when Cheryl had turned her back to him too look at John. John felt the spark at the sight of Bal's smirk, but also desperately wanted to strangle him, because before he could speak Cheryl was dragging the two men down the street, towards the home John knew too well. John wanted to make an excuse, but seeing Cheryl was being nice, and seeing Bal talk to her was surreal, on the fact he was actually getting along with her. "So you two live together or…" John felt himself blush, but before he could say no, Bal slid a arm around his waist, and Cheryl grinned "We live together at first it was to help me, the accident left me pretty messed up, but well we found we enjoyed each other's company" Bal purred, and John blushed more trying to shift from Bal because his damn body heat was driving him up the wall. "Oh that's so sweet, but you break my little brother heart, and you pay got it" Cheryl warned, and Bal smiled hearing the teasing tone, and pulled John even closer purring "Oh trust me I love him too much to do that" John throat tightened when Bal said love, and Cheryl's eyes softened at the fact Bal said it with pure sincerity. Cheryl was ecstatic on the fact her brother was somewhat settling down, even if it was with a man herself was married to Tony who was still in the house with her, and Johns father not really speaking but at least her dad wasn't being an ass to him. Her father sort of crawled into his shell when John took off, she guessed he felt betrayed by his own son they weren't close, but they didn't hate each other either, and the sudden fact John took off, and never really ever connected with them again really hurt him, but then again it hurt them all. She soon dragged John into the white two story house with a large porch in front and small fence surrounding it, Cheryl closed the gate behind her and told Bal that Faith could wander if she wanted, but Bal let her go and she didn't take off sticking close to the demon.  
>"Cheryl is that you?" called her mother from the spacious kitchen, that walls were big windows, "Yeah mom and I got some more guest come see" Cheryl shouted, and her mother came out into the front room they were standing in. John remembered watching for the bus in here on cold, or rainy days. Instead of a frail shuffling form, was a straight standing woman, with blond hair and brown eyes, Bal couldn't see but the sound of sure footsteps surprised him. Mary saw Bal first, and smiled at him and put her hand out for him to shake it, but Cheryl piped up and Bal smiled crookedly at the embarrassed women, and said it was fine then shook her hand after a few misses. "He's a friend of Johns" Cheryl told her mother who panicked slightly thinking the worst, but then Cheryl grabbed John who had slightly wandered away, and pulled him into his mothers view who hugged him tightly not saying a word. She pulled back tears in her eyes, staring at John who just kept his eyes down not wanting to see the hurt, their in his mothers eyes, but she tilted his chin up, and gave a weak smile when he saw there was no hurt just happiness. Tony came out at the sound of his new brides yell, happy to be away from Thomas Constantine's sight, not realizing he was behind him until Thomas slid into the doorway with him. Thomas was the one John got his hair color and stature from that, and that ability to make any man quake in their boots if he so desired but in reality Thomas was usually an easy man to be around, intelligent but not really talkative he kept to himself most of the time, but others would gladly chat with anybody but had little patience for the dimwitted. John guessed that was the only reason Thomas didn't hate him, was because for all the fights John got in he always kept his grades up, and never fought with the teachers. Tony narrowed his eyes at John who stared right back at him unblinkingly, unafraid of his sister's husband who after a while turned away unable to keep Johns gaze, that seemed to go right throe him just like Thomas did. John snuck a glance at his father, and saw him watching him intently, and John for a second wondered if his father recognized him at all, but his father nodded at him in a silent greeting that John recognized from his childhood. Thomas then saw Bal, and John stepped towards the demon in a protective manner, and Thomas gave a look of hurt until John told him about Bal. Tony stared at John with undisguised disgust, as he told him of his job as an exorcist something Johns parents actually took well, while Bal briefly explained his own job not really going to detail, then got them off the subject of asking John's mother what smelled so good. Soon Mary, Bal, Cheryl, and Tony went off to the kitchen leaving John, and his father alone Tony being dragged by Cheryl, who seemed to sense his weariness around her father, and brother, and tried to distract him. John turned to his father expecting anything but what he turned to see, his father smiling but instead of saying anything just watched John, his green eyes locked onto him, and seemingly refusing to budge. John stared back but Thomas just walked by John, and put a hand of his shoulder then walked towards the kitchen, but John stop him by speaking "You don't like Tony do you?" asked John not looking at his father, but was smiling.<br>Thomas shook his head, "Not one bit but I hate anyone who tries to take my kids away" John looked over at his father, and he spoke again "I do want to talk to you about why you left son, but for now let's go give that Tony bastard some hell for thinking he can just take my baby girl, and your sister". In a way that was really all his relationship was with his dad, giving others hell, and making each other laugh with crude cruel jokes. The supper was awkward for Tony, but John found Bal easily got along with his mixed up family, discussing politics, and sports but it got awkward when Cheryl started to ask questions, that could be only described as a older sister prying for info about Johns and Bal's relationship. John desperately tried to keep calm, but the fact Bal was flirting with him, and playing along the two flitted around the subject and fact the two were living together, continually dropping hints that the two of them were much more than two pals, sharing an apartment. John wanted to strangle both of them, but he was sure his mother would not approve of trying to kill his sister, during the first dinner they had together since he was a kid. They were soon ready to leave, Tony and Cheryl were going as well the men shook hands, and John and Bal both were hugged too death by Mary. John smiled and nodded to his father who did the same, they then shook hands but before John could pull away his father hugged him, and whispered something into his ear that made John go completely stiff, and silent. Bal dragged him away, and shoved John into the car Faith in back sleeping, worn out by the humans who thoroughly spoiled her rotten, John started the car still stiff, and now running on auto pilot, he jumped when Bal cleared his throat, causing the demon to instantly apologies. "It's not your fault" John grumbled finally pulling, and parking the car in a alleyway next to the bowling alley. "W-what did he say to you … you're father?" Bal asked, and John chuckled then reached over and began to trace the lines on Bal's face, making Bal move closer to John involuntarily. "Not to give you up that he didn't mind that I am gay" John told Bal who smiled, and John's hand began to wander lower to Bal's sensitive neck "So it's that obvious?" Bal purred, and John gawked at him. "Y-you and Cheryl were practically saying that we were already together!" John yelped, and Bal burst out laughing, and John finally gave up the ghost. and smiled hand still on Bal's neck, and Bal stopped laughing and began purring when John began to massage it."My brothers were angry at me ….for leaving you" Bal murmured, and felt John's shock but also his interest, in the fact they wanted the two of them back together. "They said I moped around, and was boring" Bal muttered eyes narrowing in anger, but that just made John laugh some more Bal punched him lightly, surprising John that he actually hit him, but Bal seemed even more surprised. Before Bal could apologies for nothing as per usual, John gathered him up, and pulled Bal into his lap, and before he could protest kissed him, teeth clicked, and tongues tangled together, and Bal knew then giving up his Johnny-boy would be impossible. He knew that he drove his brothers up the wall with his pouting, and moping, and they finally pushed him out of his apartment with Faith, and told him to call them when he finally jumped Johnny's bones. John began to grind their hips together, and John's mouth moved down to Bal's neck, and began to suck, and nibble at Bal's Adam apple, enlighten a moan from Bal that warmed Johns heart. They were addicted to each other, the feel. the sounds, the taste, they couldn't get enough of each other, and currently they were trying to make up for the two weeks, they were devoid of each other, their own aphrodisiacs. Bal finally got sick of the confining space that was Johns car, then attached their lips, and then opened the car a hold of John's tie keeping them entwined, as they got out, and then opened the back door to let Faith out. John then was stuck between the car, and Bal's talented tongue, and Johns could care less if Bal wanted to take him here, and now in this ally way, but Bal decided that their re-acquaintance, would be in their bed. Bal using Johns eagerness, and tie pulled him to the back door, for when the bowling ally was closed, or when you didn't want to walk through it. Faith yipped, and ran ahead of the men, and up the stairs, Bal quickly pulled John up them, once in while kissing him deeply, only to pull away enlightening groans, and growls from John making Bal snicker, and grin. They finally reached John's apartment, and John fought for the right key, while Bal drew patterns on his back with one hand, and the other began to creep lower much to Johns annoyance, since it made him fumble with the keys. John smiled in triumphant when he finally opened the door, then yelped when Balthazar grabbed a handful of his ass, he spun around but before he could tell Bal off, Bal's lips were on his, and his hands were roaming all over John's body, but really John didn't mind, and soon his own hands were lifting Bal up, and then dragged him into the apartment. John kicked the door closed, then put Bal on the table, and began to kiss him while Bal set work on the buttons of Johns shirt. "Mmmmmmhhh yea r-right their Johnny..ah" Bal pleaded, when Johns fingers found the arena were his body, and tail meet, John was soon making the same sort of pleas when Bal got his shirt open, and began to nibble at his collarbone. Bodies entwined, tongues mingled, and heads spun, Bal may of held back from taking John in the ally way, but now they were on the floor of Johns apartment, and out of sight, and safe, neither held back. John usually was the dominate one, and would gladly fight for it, but when Bal began to stretch him, now the both of them naked and pressed against each other, John spread his legs, and let Bal take what he wanted. "Please ugh ... Bal... yes right... r-right thier" John was quickly loosing his mind, as Bal stretched him slowly, and carefully heat pooling in his lower belly, and his eyes continually rolled into his skull. Bal smiled at the sounds John made, and felt himself harden at that, and the tightness of Johns ass, he then began to tease the human more by covering his chest, thighs, and face with kisses. Once in a while he would nip, and nibble on Johns collar bone, and draw him into mind blowing air sucking kisses, that left John panting like a dog in heat, sometimes even whining wanting to taste Bal more, shrieking when Bal's index finger found his prostate. "Oh keep making sounds like that love" Bal purred, mounting and getting ready to enter John, who's chest heaved, and said nothing unable to since Bal was abusing his prostate, the only things leaving his mouth were curses, and gasps. Bal then began to kiss his way the path started at Johns knee, and ended at Johns inner thigh, were Bal nipped, and kissed his other hand currently not stretching John, now was rolling Johns balls causing John to thrust his hips, and moan Bal's name. "What do you want Johnny-boy hmmmmm?" Bal teased, causing John to glare at him the effect broken when Bal cruelly dragged a finger over his prostate, and John arched off the floor, and bit back a scream as he came. John's mind was a lust filled, and speaking was a chore but John finally spoke voice hoarse, and Bal felt his cock twitch at the words, and desperation in Johns voice. "Pl-please Bal ….hah .god ..fuck me please" John groaned, moaning at Bal's finger that were once again working him, his cock was hardening at the ministrations Bal had not let up. Bal once again readied himself, leaning up to kiss John, then removed his finger, and replaced it with his cock, making John arch, and head thrash from sided to side. "Uhhhhhnnnn yes... oh god so tight...feels so good Johnny" Bal moaned, now fully sheathed in Johns body, who hadn't stopped moaning pleasure, and pain morphing together making his head spin, and body thrum with pleasure."Please please …... uhhhnngg Bal m-move" John groaned, loving the feel of Bal in him but wanting the friction, forgetting how much how much he loved the feeling of being dominated. Bal quickly began to thrust in, and out of John enlightening groans from his exorcist, that convinced him John liked it rough, and fast, and Bal gladly did aiming for Johns prostrate, and smirking when John suddenly thrust back. Bal sped up, his release curled into his lower stomach, and Johns seemed the same as he was now meeting Bal thrust to thrust, pulling him down for a sloppy heated kiss, when he knew he was about to come, knowing a angry neighbor was not something they needed. John then arched, and bit Bal's tongue pleasure, and pain the pleasure of feeling Johns inner walls constrict, and ripple around his sensitive cock finally pull him over board. At the last second Bal's right hand fell over Johns heart, and a sudden bright flash of light was what John saw before he passed out on the floor of his apartment, his lover collapsing on top of him, and the sound of Bal's voice whisper "mine."


	18. Authors Note: Last ChapterThank you

First off yes this is the last chapter but Two Sides of Me will have a redux as I have been saying much more graphic and in character. I now want to thank Cati-dono for the comments and help I want to thank Dragonlady2012 for the continuous comments that made me smile and keep going and her favorite this story. I also want to thank iFanboy who also favorite and iceblueme for their comments as well.

I now want to thank those who favorite this story: ShadowsAlwaysWin1 (who also followed this story) , and VanilLemon Sky thank you so much it means a lot

Of course I can't forget those who followed the story so last but not least thank you brandy-marie, EmpressBlack, leelee29298, nanasabaku13!

Thank you all for showing me this idea is worth it and I hope you'll read the redux their will be a lot more in-depth as well as you'll find out Bal's secreat and if anybody thinks they know what it is message me


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